Only to protect you
by Ruby4
Summary: JamesLily were n love at Hogwarts.Then James broke up with her in year7.Then Lily became the most deadly deatheater and James the most powerful auror.Now after 1 year a battle is to take place.What will they do when they c each other again?AU!FINISHED
1. chap1: getting ready

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Lily or James or..anyone else. There are only a couple of people that I made up.  
  
  
A/N: O.K. this is a fic where Lily and James usto be sweethearts in seventh year but then around the end of seventh year James broke up with her. Lily don know why. Then she got really mad cuz she had loved him and stuff and now her heart is filled with hate and...just read.   
  
"You are our secret weapon." Said the Dark Lord to a girl standing in the shadows. "When I give the signal you are to then and ONLY then come out of hiding. They can not know about you or my plan will be spoiled."   
  
"Yes my Lord." Said a very attractive slim girl about the age of 18 with long red hair that was pulled into a bun. She had emerald eyes and crimson red lips. She was wearing black jeans, tight black tank top and black boots.   
  
"Good, good. You are to train one more time tonight and then you leave and rest. Be ready tomorrow." He said. It was eleven o clock at night and Lily was glad that she would be leaving. The dark Lord had been training her personally for this battle. The battle where they would try and take over the ministry of magic. Suddenly thoughts came into her head. What would Dumbledore say? What would her teachers think of her when and if they saw her. What about her parents? What about James...  
Lily quickly dismissed these thought from her head. Her master was the only one she needed approval from now. He snapped his fingers and a death eater came in.   
"Your turn." He said.   
The deatheater looked at Lily. "N-no master please. W-what have I done?"   
"Silence! If your training has been done properly you will be able to defeat her. If not then you die of your own folly. Now start!"   
  
Meanwhile...  
"James get some rest. My spys inform me that Voldemort will be attacking tomorrow early morning. Just train one more time and then we'll call it a night." Said Dumbldore. "You're our secret weapon. The best fightor and warrior among us. Though there are rumours going around that Voldemort has been training an assasin"  
"Yes professor. Those deatheaters will not conquer us." said James   
Beside James Sirius was nodding of to sleep. Dumbldore had had them awake by six in the morning.   
"Come on James one more time. Go through the obstacle course I had Moody set up for you." Said Dumbldore.   
  
Lily was fighting the deatheater. This man is a coward she thought to herself. The deatheater was running around the training room hiding behind pillars and rocks. Lily was shooting curses at him left and right but he was to quick. Suddenly she lost him and didn't know where he went. Then she felt someone jump on her back. Voldemort clapped and more deatheaters came and surrounded Lily.   
The deatheater behind her was choking her. She quickly shot a spell at him. And ducked as the deatheaters tried to hit her. She punched and kicked and shot spells at them while ducking spells and kicks and punches from Deatheaters. Voldemort had taught her how to be completely aware of her surroundings. She could even feel it if spells were coming at her. She could duck and shield herself from about a hundred different spells at one time. Yes Voldemort was very proud of his student. There was also one more thing Lily could do but she had difficulty doing it. Deateaters were little by little multiplying in numbers after every two minutes 5 more would come and start attacking her joinig their fellow deatheaters. Lily concentrated hard and suddenly a white light erupted from her. It was all around her and all the deatheaters were on the floor in two seconds flat. Lily was kneeling on the floor gasping for air. Sweat dropping from her face. Yes Lily could perform curses by concentrating hard without a wand and when she did it affected everyone around her within a 6 feet distance.   
"Did you..." Voldemort said hopefully.   
"No they are stunned." She replied   
voldemort was VERY proud of her but there was just one problem. No matter what she never killed or used the cruciatus curse. He had been hoping that she would maybe today actually kill but she didn't. A servant came in had a towel and water bottle for Lily in her hands.   
Voldemort sighed and said in his usual hissing voice. "You have got to learn to kill."   
"I can't." she replied simply and left for her house that had been given to her by Voldemort. She was easily his favorite. She was never called his servant or his deatheater. She was always given a certain amount of respect by Voldemort. She was his right hand and second in command. She was envied by most. When ever the deatheaters were called she was never made to kiss the hem of his robes. She would just bow to him and then she would stand tall and proud by his side in the middle of the circle and the deatheaters would come and kiss the hem of her robes right after Voldemorts. This was partly done because Voldemort knew If she didn't get the respect needed she would either revolt against him or she would quite and now there was no use in ever trying to send someone to kill her she'd finish them of in a millisecond. Plus she was to precious to his plans to lose now. Also Voldemort didn't mind giving her so much respect. She did deserve it and was almost as powerful as he was "maybe even more." Said Voldemort to himself. From day one she was a fast learner during training and that was how they found out her special power. Lily drove to her three story huge house which she lived in alone. She ran upto her room changed her clothes and laid down on her bed. Her thoughts wondered to her life. Her life had been perfect. Her parents were the best and she had been in love. In love with James Potter the popularist, cutest, Quidditch captain, straight A student and all around nice guy in school. They had gone out for about 2 and a half years. Every one was sure that James would propose to her as soon as they were out of school. A tear fell down Lilys cheek. She remembered it quite well.   
Flashback...  
"Hey Lily could I talk to you for a minute?" James asked.   
"Sure." She replied. She got up from the table where she had been sitting with her friends.   
They went upto the common room.   
"Lily listen...please don't stay mad at me but I think we should break up." He said quickly   
Lily was stunned. She felt and ice brick build up inside her stomach and then tears came.   
"Why? I thought you-you loved me. You said so yourself earlier this year!" she said   
"Well...people make mistakes I thought it was love but it wasn't." he replied not looking into her eyes.   
"Is there someone else?" she asked angrily  
James was silent and then said "Yea there is someone else." And with that he left.   
"Stop right there James Potter!" Lily shrieked tears coming out of her eyes. "You are a self centered and arrogant bastard! Everyone had told me you were a player but I never believed them but I geuss I was wrong! I hate you and never want to see you again!" with that she pulled of the golden heart shaped locket with heres and James picture in it and threw it at him. James had given it to her for her birthday. Then she ran upstairs to her room. The next day Dumbledore called her to his office. She still hadn't gotten over James break up and her eyes were red and puffy. Her face marked with tear streaks and she had become drastically thin. Graduation day was tomorrow.   
"Ms. Evans I'm sorry to say this but your parents have died in a car crash." Dumbldore said sadly. Lily felt tears spring to her eyes once more.   
"I know how hard this is. Especially after yesterdays break up...yes I know about it. The whole teachers staff does."   
"Leave me alone! You don't know how I feel! The people I love most in this world have abandoned me!" she shrieked and ran out of the office. She was crying silently in a corner when Lucious Malfoy suddenly appeared.   
"what happened to you?" he asked in a half mocking voice. Lily and Malfoy hadn't hated each other but they weren't on good terms either. Lily had dated him for about 3 months in 5th year and then they had broken up but at the moment Lily needed someone to talk to.   
"I'm left alone in this world." She said sobbingly. "No one is left to take care of me. Where will I live until I have a job? My sister hates me and would never take me in. Everyone I love most are gone. Why?! Why?!" Lily started wailing.   
"Lily I know someone that could take care of you. That could give you a job and even a second family." Malfoy said   
"Who?" asked Lily sniffling   
"I'll show you tomorrow after graduation." He replied.   
End of flashback.   
At first Lily had been reluctant to join Voldemort. He was in the newspapers and Lily knew that he was evil. But at the time she had been vulnerable and promises of protection had gotten to her. Voldemort was the only one who had been there to comfort her in this time she thought to herself. He is my family now and she fell asleep.   
  
"James was dodging every curse and obstacle thrown at him. Then suddenly Moody came into view and they both battled for awhile until James almost stunned him.  
"You're doing good!" said Moody "but now it's time for you to rest. Good night."   
Suddenly a few hundred knives came barreling towards him at all sides. James just closed his eyes concentrating hard and the knives stopped and fell to the ground.   
"Very good! It only took you 50 seconds that time." Said Moody. James could do spells with out a wand just by concentrating which was very rare among wizards.   
James at the moment was thinking about something or someone else.   
He remembered how he had broken up with Lily to protect her. He was to become an Auror or assassin and Dumbldore had advised him to break up with Lily.   
"As long as she's with you she will be in danger." Dumbledore had said.   
He remembered how He had lied to her that there was someone else and it hurt him like anything. He still wore the golden locket around his neck that he had given Lily. It was right under his shirt. He would always wear it for Good luck.   
He and Sirius went home and fell asleep.   
  
Voldemort smiled maliciously. I am going to take over tomorrow. He thought to himself. I have been working on this plan for about a year. Ever since the day a spy informed me of James breaking up with Lily. How I had killed her parents making it look like a car crash. Having Crabbe drive his car right into her parents. Then sending Malfoy to bring her to me. She was so easy to persuade.   
He looked into a round ball of fire that was in his hand. In the middle of the fire it showed a picture of Lily sleeping in her bed.   
  
A/N:O.K. what do you think? Should I continue?! TELL me if its gud or not by revewing. Then I'll know if I should continue or not. Please REVIEW! Next chapter will be about the battle! REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pleeeeaaaaassseee! I love reviews besides I'm not to sure if this is a good story or not and if I get a lot of revewis tehn I'll continue. Criticism helps to! Ideas are also welcome. Ok now click that little but that says click here to review. You know which one!   
  
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	2. chap2:the battle

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Lily or James or..anyone else. There are only a couple of people that I own.   
  
A/N: Thank you everyone that reviewed! And special thanks to Melanie Granger who helped me make a VERY hard decision on how they should meet. OK on with the chapter! Yup I changed my pen name angel was just to common!  
  
Lily wore a tight black tank top and tight black jeans. She was wearing black boots in which she had slipped a knife. Her hair was open and she was wearing a huge black cloak with its hood over her head. At first Lily had refused saying "I am no coward! I do not fear to show them my face." But Voldemort had persisted saying it was the sighn of a deatheater. At the moment she stood beside Voldemort getting ready to apparate. Voldemort gave the signal and they all apartated to a part of land that had a lot of greenery with a huge hill at its side. About 20 feet away stood an army of Aurors ready for battle. Behind them was the Ministry of magic building. Lily looked hard at the army of Aurors. They all had the same look in their eyes. The look of battle, of willingly dieing to defend what was theres, a look of determination...  
The tension was building up between the two sides. Each waiting for the other to attack first. Lily was at the front of the army ready to lead them. She walked infront of the army as it followed her. She reached the army and saw that Alastor Moody was infront of the aurors army. A smile played at her lips. Voldemort who was beside her stared menacingly at Moody. Moody stared back defiantly until Voldemort finally dropped his gaze from Moodys.   
"It's still not to late to give up." Said Moody.   
"The Dark Lord never gives up." said Voldemort in a deadly whisper. "Attack!"   
Lily quickly front flipped right into the middle of the aurors army leaving Voldemort to fight with Moody. She did not know though that Voldemort had disapparatd to the back of his army. An Auror came lunging towards Lily. Lily effortlessly stunned him. She started stunning every auror she saw left and right. Then one auror actually hit her with a spell in the stomach. Lily felt a pain in her stomach but Lily quickly shot the disarming spell at him and the guy was striped of his wand. Then she stunned him. The dust rose around her but she still walked going forward trying to stun and disarm as many aurors as she could on the way. The thing she did not notice though was that a messy black haired, brown eyed youth was crouched behind a bush on the hill above watching the whole ordeal. James was clad in a dark green cloak and jeans and a t-shirt. The green cloak was over his head. James caught Moodys eye from the hill and pointed towards the girl that was stunning aurors as if it was the easiest thing in the world. Moody nodded to him. James jumped down from the hill with his powers levitating him slowly to the ground. Nobody noticed. James landed right in front of Lily.   
"Sorry but I can't let you go any further." He said in a half  
teasing voice and decided nnot to take his hood of.   
"Oh and who are you to try to stop me?" Lily said In an amusing voice.   
"And who are you to think you can get past me?" he replied   
Lily shot the stunning spell at him which James expertly dodged. Then he shot her the disarming spell which Lily ducked and slid her leg over to Jameses feet making him fall. He quickly jumped back up.   
"Hey you're pretty good." James said while dodging another spell she shot at him. "for a deatheater."   
James gave her a punch in the stomach which hit Lily hard. Lily hit another spell at him.   
"And you're pretty good for a self centered stuck up auror." Lily replied. Back flipping to avoid a kick aimed for her. "But I tire of this. I could've wiped you out in two seconds if it wasn't for the fact that I took pity on you."   
"Save your pity for someone who needs it! Give me your best shot." He replied.   
Lily started concentrating hard. A white light started vibrating around her. Then everyone around her was knocked of their feet. Even James. By now almost everyone was watching the fight. Well everyone around them that is.   
James concentrated hard and suddenly Lily fell back. Everyone else was quite a distance away from them by now and watching. Only people on the outer rims of the battle were still fighting.   
Lily began to concentrate hard as did James. A white ball enveloped Lily while a yellow one enveloped James. The balls grew bigger and bigger untill the lights touched. Both were almost knocked of their feet then. Lily back flipped and formed a flame in her hand and shot it towards James who quickly reflected it back to Lily with one movement of his hand. Lily formed a big bright white light around her and it reached James knocking him of balance. He flew backwards and landed hard on his back.   
"You asked for it deatheater." He said gritting his teeth. He formed a huge big bright red ball around him which started getting bigger and bigger. Lily did the same except hers was green. Both the lights met and Lily fought with all her power to have the light reach James. James was sweating trying to make it reach Lily first. Jameses hood fell off. Lily had had her eyes closed in concentration. After awhile she opened her eyes and slowly started to lift her head. She gasped.   
"James..." she whispered and lost concentration and the light that had been protecting her died. Jameses red light reached her and made her fly backwards and into the hill. Everyone heard a sickening crunch telling them that Lily had probably broken her arm. Her hood fell of off revealing her face as she fell to the ground from about 15 feet. James ran over to her.   
"Lets see who this badass babe is." He said. He had almost reached the place where Lily was laying. He only needed to see the puddle of fiery red hair around Lilys head to know who it was.   
"Oh God no." he whispered. "Please no." he said and quickened his pace. He reached Lily who was lying on the ground. James was stunned.   
He sat down next to her and took her in his arms. The locket that he always wore hung down from his neck in full view. Lily opened her eyes.   
"Lily!" he exclaimed as tears silently slipped down his cheeks. Lily just looked at the locket he was wearing. She tried to say something but became unconscious before she could.   
"Attack!"Voldemort yelled. "They have killed our champion! Make them pay! James Potter I'll deal with you!" Voldemort exclaimed angrily. James picked Lily up in and disapparated before Voldemort could reach him.   
  
A/N: OK what do you think?! Review and thanks for Revewing !  
LilyEvansPotter, Mage of fire, applepie, TheWiltedRose, soccergirl, lexi, Beauty Full, CharismaBrianne, Quennofthequeer, sciencefreak, Melanie Granger (LOVE YOUR REVEIWS!!), Tap-Chan, zissy, Paulina and Fawkes89. MORE REVEIWS! I have the next chapter written and everything but I'm gonna wait till I get....about 15-20 reviews and then update! Review! Please now click that button down there.  
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	3. chap3: Seeing each other again.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Lily or James or..anyone else. There are only a couple of people that I own.   
  
A/N:I posted as soon as I found out that ff.net is working again. Sorry for being so late MORE REVEIWS!  
  
  
James disapparated to a muggle hospital knowing how Lily would be treated at a wizards hospital if they found out she was a deatheater. He quickly threw of his cloak. He was wearing jeans and a black t-shirt. Carrying Lily into the Hospital he went to a nurse.   
"Please it's an emergency! My friend and I were driving and we had an accident. It was a hit and run driver!" James explained quickly. He himself lived in a muggle apartment and knew how to deal with them.   
The nurse quickly had some paramedics take Lily on a stretcher into a room.   
"You have to fill this form out." Said the nurse handing it to him. After filling it out and writing all the information he knew about Lily he went into the room where Lily was. She was still unconscious but there was a docter there.   
"She'll have to get stitches and her arm is broken pretty badly and she's got bruises all over her body pretty bad. If I didn't know better I'd say she fell 15 feet from the sky." The docter said. He took Lily into the operating room and James called Remus and Peter telling them about where he was. They were in the Ministry of Magic building watchinge everything and apparently Voldmeort had chickened out and left after James had taken Lily. Sirius was also there and started cursing the hell out of Voldemort and his deatheaters. James laughed and hung up still worried about Lily. Then after what seemed like forever they came back out.   
"She'll be conscious within a few hours." The docter replied. "She's out of the danger zone now."  
James waited by her bedside anxiously.After sometime Lily stirred.   
"Oww." She groaned. With her eyes closed and touching her head.   
"Lily! You're O.K.!" James exclaimed and hugged her. When Lily heard those words and that voice she was awake in two seconds. Lily thought to herself. But when she felt those all to familiar arms around her she knew it was James. She pulled away from James in anger.   
"Where the hell have you taken me?" she hissed.   
"You're at a muggle hospital. I brought you here when you fell..." James said quietly.  
"Take me back!" Lily exclaimed and noticed that her arm was in a caste. "I hate you! Go away!" Lily shrieked with tears freely flowing down her cheeks. "You are a self centered, ignorant bastard and I hate you! You used me and played with my feelings!" She exclaimed and in a much quieter tone she whispered. "Why?"  
"Lily I didn't use you. I usto and still do love you." James said in a quiet voice.   
"Liar! Then why did you break up with me? Why did you cheat on me? Why?! Because you couldn't get what you wanted from me?!" Lily said still yelling   
"Lily no! There was no other woman! It was all done to protect you! I was supposed to become an Auror and that would put you in danger." He explained   
"Damn you James! To protect me from what? I'm a big girl and can take care of myself. I would've rather been with you and die the next day than never be with you at all!" Lily replied then went on in a much quieter voice. "The very next day my parents died. I was all alone in the world after that day. It seemed as if everyone I truly cared for had left me. Petunia would never take me in and if she did my life would have been miserable. My best friend Mary had died just 6 months ago and I didn't have any family. Then Voldemort came and offered me a second family, a home and protection. He was the only one there for me after that certain day. I almost committed suicide once when it all became to much to bear. Then who was there for me? Voldmeort and his fellow deatheaters...my deatheaters!" Tears were running down Lilys face and her eyes had become red.   
James made a movement to hug her.   
"Don't you dare touch me James Edward Potter! I hate you! I hate you!" she said while using her unbroken arm to pound her fist on his chest in hopes of hurting him but Lily was to weak from battle and her blows felt like nothing to James.  
"Ssshhh Lily I'm sorry I really am." He replied and pulled her into a strong hug. Lily made one last weak effort to pull back but she was to weak. She sat there with James hugging her and her head on his chest while she cried silently. Letting out all the pain she had been feeling ever since they had broken up while James ran his fingers through her hair whispering soothing words in her ear.Then when Lily had finally calmed down James lifted her head up slightly so their lips were inches apart and Lily hesitantly brought her lips up to meet his. Their lips met and Lily felt as if everything was suddenly alright. As their kiss grew more passionate they heard a huge commotion out side of Lilys room. The door was closed of course but still there was a lot of noise. Both ignored the noise as James moved his hands up and down Lilys back and Lilys arm moved down to Jameses back feeling his muscles that had developed from Quidditch and auror training. James pulled Lily closer then suddenly heard the two words that had been least expected.   
"Aveda Kedavra."   
Lily and James pulled away from each other in surprise. James quickly grabbed his wand and was about to go out when the door suddenly burst open. There was a deatheater standing there.   
"To get to Lily you have to get through me first!" Exclaimed James.   
The deatheater hit the Aveda Kedavra spell at James which James blocked. But he to was weak from battle not as much as Lily but he was still tired. Then seven or eight more deatheaters came in. They all surrounded James. James was to exhausted to use his powers and he tried his best to stun them all but he was out in one blow. One of the deatheaters came to Lily and tried to help her get up. Lily couldn't because she was to weak. The deatheater picked her up gently.   
"Take that auror as a prisoner. He'll be a good bargaining tool." Said the Deatheater.   
"No!" Lily exclaimed. The deatheaters looked at her from under their hoods. "Just don't! I'm your commander and I command you to not take him prisoner." Lily said with a finality in her voice. The deatheaters obeyed.   
James woke up after sometime and by then the ministry of magic was there putting memory charms on the muggles.   
"Lily!" James said quickly getting up. He was on a stretcher with Sirius, Remus and Peter gathered around him.   
"Hold on James." Said Sirius. "she was taken by the deatheaters."   
"What?!We have got to get her back!" James exclaimed.   
"James the witnesses said that they saw no resistance from Lily when she was picked up. Just one order and that they shouldn't take you as a prisoner." Said Remus gently.   
James ignored him. "We have to get her back!" he exclaimed.   
"How?! " Sirius asked "she didn't even show any resistance what if she wants to stay there?!"  
"She doesn't" James exclaimed "I know her!"   
"James calm down!" said Remus. "We'll figure something out later on. For now just keep quiet."   
James sadly laid back down. He had held Lily in his arms. For a few moments he had held her in his arms.  
  
Lily was in a black dress with spaghtti straps and was tight from the top but not from the waist down. She was out on her balcony looking up at the moon. The wind was blowing and her hair flew in the direction of the wind which was right at her so her hair blew behind her as did her dress. She had a straight almost sad face and looked forlornly up at the sky as the moon shone on her making her look like some angel. Lucious came up behind her.   
"Lily how long are you going to stay like this?" he asked.   
Lily didn't answer.   
"Lily! Master is getting very upset. You haven't talked, trained or done anything at all since that 1 month ago!" he exclaimed.   
Lily still didn't answer. She had been moved to Voldemorts house incase the aurors tried to come for her and also so she could be kept under close supervision by the docters as she had not spoken at all and frequently got sick. The docters said it was because of depression and not eating properly. Lily had gotten drastically thin for sometime but then had become normal again ever since she had started taking the anti depression potion but all it did was make her eat. She still missed James like hell and knew she'd never see him again.   
"Lily!" Lucious said in anger and punched the wall. Lily on the other hand was not fazed and walked past him into her room. Lucious angrily left. Just as he closed the door Lily burst into tears. She sobbed uncontrollably into her pillow until she fell asleep.   
  
"I don't care somehow I want to see Lily and talk to her!" said James at an auror meeting.   
"James calm down. Number one do you have any ideas how you can see her? Number two what if she lures you into a trap?" said Dumbledore.   
"Proffessor I have to see her and talk to her!." James exclaimed.   
Suddenly Proffessor Flitwick along with Proffessor Sprout came into the room.   
McGonagoll was right behind them.   
"It's Sybll." Said Profesor Flitwick. "We think she h-had a true prediction."   
"Dumbledore I think it's nonsense." Said McGonagoll. "But these two will not listen."   
"Because it's not nonsense!" said Proffesor Sprout. "we were sitting in the teachers lounge talking about er...Lily and well Sybll was burning incents everywhere and throwing herbs into the fire that made the longe smell like her room. Then she sat down in a chair and was about to say something when she went rigid and her head lolled to the side and her eyes went to the backside of her head and she said this." And Proffessor Sprout took out her wand and said a few chosen words with which a picture of Sybll coming out of it and hanging in mid air.   
"The flower" said Sybll "The flower and the prankster. Both magically powerfull both ready to sacrfice their lives for each other. But for not each other they will sacrifice but for another. A child dear to them both. Both combined and with the power of sacrifice can bring down the dark lord. The prankster the marauder the stag combined with the flower, the pure of heart can bring down the Dark Lord. The key is in the child. The child alone." Then suddenly Sybll stood up straight. "I must have dozed of there for a second. As I was saying James is very foolish to go looking for that deatheater girl Lily. She never believed in my predictions anyway..."  
  
James was stunned.   
"This prophecy I think is pointing to you and Lily. The marauder the flower combined. Maybe you two have to combine your powers to defeat Voldemort." Said Dumbledore.   
"Yea but the child? Who's the child? Maybe it's some child we meet later on in life." Said James.   
"yes I suppose you're right. I'm going to work on this prophecy. You go get some rest." Said Dumbledore.   
"Yes Proffessor." James replied and went home. On the way he past a flower shop. He looked at the big bouqet of white Lilies. A little girl of about four or five years was also looking at the bouqet. He sighed.   
"I miss you Lils." He whispered. Then he went in and bought the bouqet.   
"Hey mister!" said the little girl. She had blonde hair down to her shulders and thy were in braids. She was wearing a pink sundress and when she smiled James noticed she had one tooth missing. "Who are you buying that for? You got a girlfriend?" she asked interestedly.  
"No." he smiled. "Well I do in a way but I'm just buying them for myself."   
"C-could I have one little flower out of it?" she asked a bit shyly. " You see I love Lilies but I don't gots enough money." She said sadly "My mom says that there is no pint in buying flowers but I still like them and come here everyday and look at them."   
James smiled. "what's your name?" he asked   
"Ashley" she replied.  
James took one flower out of the bouquet and gave the rest to Ashley.  
"Thank you mister!" she replied and went of happily.  
"My name is James Potter." He said and smiled and left. Oddly enough he suddenly felt so much better. He was positive he'd find Lily.  
  
A/N: Thanks for reviewing I want more reviews though! I'll post my thank you thingy up in chap 4! Right now I want to get this up as soon as possible! 


	4. Chap4: The mission.

Disclaimer: I don own a thing except for um...some people and the plot! Oh and I own Ashley!  
A/N: Ok so what do you think of this story so far? One word...Review!!!!!  
  
  
"James you look as if you had to help Hagrid feed fang." Said Sirius as James entered the flat from one of his long sad walks. Today was Valentines day.   
"So would you if the person you loved most was a deatheater and was Voldemorts right hand man er- girl." Said James.   
"I know lets play a game. Wizards Challenge!" said Sirius.  
"I played that game the night I told Lily-"James was cut of by Remus.  
"Don't be so...sulky. James you need to have some fun. Maybe Wizards Challenge will cheer you up."   
Sirius brought the game in. Wizards Challenge consisted of a board and a deck of cards. Each card had a challenge on it and points according to how hard each challenge was. How ever many points was on the card you'd move that many spaces on the which had spaces on it and a pawn for each person wanting to play. The first person to reach the end of the board won. If you refused to do a challenge you would turn into an animal and have to move back one space.  
"Right I get to be the black dog." Said Sirius. He picked up a card. "Go to a club...and get a girlfriends you stupid twits. It's Valentines day and you all got nothing to do other than play me." Sirius spoke up. "Right well I geuss the game smarter than us. Lets go!" said Sirius. "Oh and I get..." Sirius looked at the card. "5 points for that.  
***  
  
Sirius, Remus, Peter, James, Lily and Amy were all sitiing around during fifth year Christmas holidays. It was late night and no body else was up. Amy announced she was going to sleep and left for her dorm. James was looking into the fireplace deep in thought.   
"James? What's wrong?" asked Lily. "Your mind seems to be somewhere else these days."   
"That's 'cause Jamsie boy here is in loooooooove." Said Sirius grinning wickedly.   
"Oh who is it? Who is it?" asked Lily interestedly. "Do I know her?"  
"What makes you so sure it's a her?" asked Sirius.  
"I am not gay Sirius." James snapped.  
"Who is she?!" Lily asked again.  
"Well yes you do know her." Said Peter.   
"Oh tell me! Wait is it Amy?!" Lily asked.   
"No it's- MMMMM! MMMMM!" Remus had clapped his hand over Sirius' mouth.  
"I think it's late. Peter, Sirius and I are tired." Said Remus.   
"I'm not-OW!" Peter exclaimed as Remus stepped on his foot. Remus then dragged the two boys up the stairs. Lily giggled her long red hair falling in her face.   
"So James tell me!" Lily said. She was sitting across from James on an armchair.   
"Er...no. Not today." Said James. Lily got up and came to sit down on the sofa with him.   
"Please?" she pouted.   
She looks so cute like that with her white night gown on, her hir falling in her face and her lower lip sticking out maybe I should tell her... James thought to himself.   
"Uhhh..."   
Lily widened her eyes innocently.   
"Well..." James hesitated.   
"O.K. I get the picture you don't want to tell me. Lets make a deal. On Christmas you have to tell me." Said Lily.   
"That's tomorrow." Said James.   
"I know." Said Lily. "Here's the catch. We'll play wizard challenge. If I win then you tell who she is tomorrow. If you win then you don't have to tell me until you want to." Said Lily.   
"Fine." Said James. He summoned the game from his room.  
"Right I want to be the dove." Said Lily. She automatically handed James the stag. "O.K. Prongs lets start."  
Three hours later.   
"Go jump in the lake and I hope you drown it's almost midnight and I'm tired." Lily said.   
"Wonder what animal you'll turn into." James mused.   
Lily got up.   
"Where are you going?" he asked.   
"This card is worth ten points. I need ten points to win." Said Lily.   
"Lily you can't be serious."   
  
  
"If you drown it's not my fault!" James exclaimed as Lily stripped herself of her night gown and got ready to jump in the lake.   
"I'll keep that in mind!" Lily yelled back and got ready to dive.   
"Lily wait I'll just tell-"  
SPLASH!  
James ran over to the water. "Lily!" he yelled. No one came up from underneath the water. "LILY!" He yelled. He bent down so that his nose was a few inches away from the water.   
Lily suddenly came up right where Jameses face was, her arms unconsciously going around Jameses neck.  
"You scare to easily." Said Lily. Putting her arms down. She splashed him with water.   
"Lily that wasn't funny. Come on. Lets go back inside." He said pulling his face away slightly from the water.   
"Fine." Said Lily. She got out and put her night gown on.   
"You need to dry off." Said James. "You also need some medical attention."   
"Oh come on!" said Lily putting her arm around Jameses shoulder in a friendly way as if they were old chums (which they were.). "You've done worse things."  
"Have not."   
"Have too. Honestly making McGonagoll grow whiskers. Becoming illegal Anigmagus. Oh and the time when you-"  
"Get the point." snapped James. They reached the common room.   
"Hey! It's 12:00! James it's tomorrow and I won! Spit it out! Who is she?!" Lily asked.   
"YaLmmphy." Muttered James.   
"What?" asked Lily.   
James took s deep breathe.   
"Maybe I should show her to you instead." He said and lead her over to the fire. Picking up a book that James had been reading ever since fifth year started he handed it to her.   
"Quidditch through the ages?" Lily asked confused. "Don't tell me you fell in love with the witch riding the broom stick! She's been dead for a long time." Said Lily.  
"Just look at the book." Said James.   
Lily opened it and gasped. The book dropped to the floor. It wasn't a book at all. It was a photo album and the pages showed hundreds of pictures. All of them Lilys pictures. She was in Jameses arms in one less than a second.   
"James." Lily said into his shirt. "I-I've loved you for a long time!"  
"Why didn't you tell me?" asked James.   
"I was afraid you didn't love me. Why didn't you tell me you loved me?" she asked  
"Same reason as you." He replied. Lily tilted her head upwards and her lips met Jameses. They broke away and Lily started moving back and then Lily was being pulled away. James looked and saw Voldemort holding Lily by the arm. Her night gown which was sleeveless showed the Dark Mark burning on her smooth silky skin. Lily struggling to get back to James.   
"James! Don't leave me!" she shrieked.   
James reached out to grab her but it seemed as if Lily had gotten farther. She kept going farther and farther until she looked like a small dot.   
"Don't leave me again!" she shrieked.   
  
James woke up in cold sweat.   
"I won't leave you." He whispered into the dark. "I won't leave you again."  
He fingered the gold locket around his neck. He opened it. It was made of pure gold and there was one picture of James and another of Lily. On the back the engraving said. 'I will always love you love James'.   
The front of the locket in shiny swirly gold writing were the words Lily. Sudenly something inside him jerked. Without hesitation he got up and put his clothes that he had worn yesterday on. He crept out of the apartment slowly not to wake Sirius. He then walked towards the flower shop he had first met Ashley at. Since then the two had become great friends and James was Like an older brother to Ashley. But he wasn't going there for Ashley.   
***  
Lily wearing a black plain silky dress walked down the muggle street tiredly.   
Voldemort had decided to send her on a mission with Luscious. There was some muggle politicion he wanted out of the way and the problem was. H wasn't muggle but a wizard under cover. He had stumbled across some information about Voldemorts next attack. This wizard was also extremely powerful and well guarded.  
"Right you distract that Auror over there. He saw my face at the battle and he'll recognize me."   
"Well go of somewhere." Said Lucious.   
"Where?" asked Lily impatiently.   
"Oh I dunno how about that flower shop over there? Otherwise they'll see you hanging around."   
Lily walked over to the flower shop. She saw a little girl standing there holding a white Lily.   
"Hello there." Said Lily figuring she might as well make some conversation with the girl.   
"Hi! My names Ashley! What's yours?" she asked.   
"It's Lily."   
"Oh you know I love the flower Lily." Said the Ashley enthusiastically.   
"Well that's nice. How about I buy you a bouqet of Lilies?" asked Lily enthusiastically. She didn't know why but this girl. She was impossible to not love. Lily loved this little girl even though she'd just met her.   
Taking the girl inside she bought her a bouqet. She picked Ashley up and settled Ashley on her hip. While Ashley played with the flowers.   
"You're pretty." Said Ashley. "Just like the flower."   
"Thanks." Said Lily. She heard Lucious call her over. "Listen you have fun with your flowers I have to go." And Lily left.   
"I've been calling you for so long." He hissed. "You apparently were to busy buying little girls flowers."   
Lily ignored him. She stepped over the stunned Auror and walked towards the drive. Another guard was at the door. She took Lucious by the arm and linked her with it.   
"Hello." Said Lily pleasantly. "We are here to meet Mr. Bradford."   
"It's kind of late don't you think?" asked the guard suspiciously.   
"You know it could've been easier to just let us in." said Lily and punched him. Lucious then stunned him. They went through the door unruffled. The house was quiet. Everyone was sleeping. They split up and Lily walked into the kitchen. Lily then saw a maid in a bathrobe opening the fridge. Garbbing the maid by the for arm she pinned her against the wall the maids hand behind her back and the maids face up against the wall.   
"Now you will listen to me and do what I say." Lily hissed into her ear.   
The maid nodded.   
"Good now with out looking at me you will call the master of this house and tell him some friends are here to see them. Tell him it's important." Said Lily. The maid without looking at Lily used an intercom to contact the master.   
"Mr. Bradford." She said her voice shaking. Lily put her wand which the made thought a night or gun hard against the maids back. "Some friends are here to see you." She said.   
"WHAT?! At this hour?" he exclaimed.   
"They say it's important." Said the maid.   
Bradford swore. "They can wait there 'till I wake up then." He said irritably.  
"Mention the name Voldemort." Lily whispered.   
"They-They're mentioning some person named Voldemort." The maid replied.   
"I'll be right there." Came the brief reply.   
"Lucious then appeared from the door. "Smart." He said.   
"Tell him to meet us in the dining room." Said Lily.   
"They'll meet you in the dining room." The maid said through the intercom.   
"Hell they can meet me in Antarctica just keep them there." Bradford replied.   
"Show us the way to the dining room." Said Lily. Pushing the maid ahead of her.   
They were lead to the dining room where Lucious took out his wand.   
"Avada-"  
"Lucious no. There's no reason to kill her. Let her live." Said Lily.   
"Lily she's no use to us now. She should die." Said Lucious.   
"No!" said Lily and concentrated hard. The wand belonging to Lcious floated over to Lily.   
"Leave and don't tell anyone about this or else I will let him kill you." Said Lily and pushed her out the door. After a few minutes the door opened. In came a man in his fourties with graying brown hair and a bulky build.  
"Who are you? You guys have any news on the Dark Lord?" asked Bradford.   
"We have news alright." Said Lily. She pointed her wand at him.   
"The news is. Keep out of The Dark Lords business and he'll let you live. Oh but you already broke that rule. Tell me how heaven is." Said Lily and hit him over the head.   
"Wait! You're Lily Evans!" The man exclaimed. "I've been working on your case for years. Your parents they were killed by-"  
"Aveda Kedavra!" Lucious hissed and the man died.  
"LUSCIOUS!" Screamed Lily. "He was about to tell-to tell-" then Lilys body was raked with sobs.   
"Sshhh." Said Lucious hugging her.   
"Why did you?" Lily asked.   
"Because I knew he was lying. Whatever he was going to say. It would be a lie. To torture you. As a punishment for killing him. You don't deserve that." Finished Lucious stroking her hair. Lilys back rose and fell as sobs raked her body. Lily stood up stiffly.   
"oh I've been crying ever since-"  
"Don't say it." Said Lucious. "Potter isn't worth your trouble. He's caused you nothing but pain."   
Lily looked her eyes searching Lucious. she thought   
Luscious brought himself down to meet Lilys lips. Lily pulled.   
"No." said Lily allowed. "No." and with that she ran out of the house and reached the flower shop. Lucious followed her out running.   
"Lily." He called. "LILY!" but Lily didn't listen she blindly ran into some one. Lily froze. The scent. The shirt. The muscles. She looked up and she was looking into Jameses eyes. To late she'd already said the disapparation spell as she'd bumped into James. She disappeared with a small 'pop'.   
***  
James couldn't believe it. He had on pure instinct ended up here and there was Lily. He could tell she'd been crying.   
She looked up at him and then disapparated. James saw Lucious and turned his back. Lucious then disapparated. James looked down at his hand that Lily had held for a brief moment. There was a piece of parchment there which said 'Tommorrow here time.'  
How'd she written that so quickly James didn't know but he knew time meant same time. He then saw Ashley looking at him from inside the flower shop.   
"Blimey! And all this time I thought you were muggles!" she exclaimed.   
  
A/N:OK WHAT DO YOU THINK?!!! REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! I think maybe if that review thingy turns from 37 into a 50 I'll update. I hope this chapter was good. I worked a bit harder on this. Hope it was better! Thanks to all who reviewed!  
  
CrazieBabieMeg: I know if I was her I'd be pissed of for a longer time to but well I'm not her and plus would you still be pissed of at the guy after you heard his explanation? Anyway thanks for Reviewing!  
  
Leigh Black: You aren't on msn that much anymore. Oh and what was that surprise you were talking about?  
  
Kelton: I'd really appreciate it if you'd be my editor. I need one! And since you are one of the people that have some criticism I decided you'd be a good editor. Email me! 


	5. chap5: It's your choice

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Lily or James or..anyone else. There are only a couple of people that I own. Like ASHLEY! I LOVE HER SHE'S SO CUTE AND SMALL AND SWEET AND...**gets hit on the head with a tomato** OW! OK ok here's the story.   
  
A/N: Here's the next chap and I know I said 50 rveiws equal next chap but im in a good mood and fee like writing. I dunno how long this writing spree will last so I figured hey use it to it's full extent.   
  
"Blimey! And all this time I thought you were muggles!" she exclaimed.   
  
"Ashley?! You aren't a muggle?" James asked feeling dizzy all of a sudden.   
"No." she said. "My mums a witch and my dad was a wizard." She said. (her dad had died.)   
"You never told me..."   
Ashley laughed. "That's because I thought you were a muggle silly."  
James sat down on the street and Ashley came out of the shop.  
"Are you all right? That lady you bumped into. She's awfully nice and bought me these flowers. Her names Lily."  
"I know her already." Said James.  
"You do? Then why'd she disapparate?"  
"Never mind that." said James. "Why are you out this late? It's 4 in the morning. Won't your mum be worried"  
Ashley shrugged. "It doesn't matter. She is always gone on some work and I usually just go home when I'm hungry or sleepy."  
"But your only 5!" exclaimed James.   
"Yea but you see the work my mum does..." ahe trailed off, James knew what she meant. Her mom worked night and day and still it wasn't enough. All she could do was dress herself and Ashley properly and pay for the house rent. Her mum would usually just eat at work and Ashley would manage with bread and water given to her by the cook at the bakery shop across from the flower shop. She spent all her time around this place and everyone had grown to love Ashley. Despite her problems she was always happy and there was just something about her that made everyone wanted to be as nice as they could to her on first sight.   
"Come on Ashley I'm taking you to your home." Said James.   
***   
"My Lord." Murmured Lily bowing. "Mission complete."  
"Good." Said Voldemort.   
Lily then left with a swish of her cloak meeting Lucious on the way to her room. Lucious bowed acknowledging her. Lily walked past him.   
"My Lord." Said Lucious kissing the hem of Voldemorts robes and then standing up. "I tried..."  
"Try harder then. I will not lose her to that muggle loving fool Dumbledore. Just a few more months and I'll be invincible. Then she can go running to that fool James Potter and there will be nothing anyone can do to defeat me!"   
"My Lord Narcissa and I are to be married next year. I can not live a charade like this for long."   
"Lucious there is one thing I have learned about Lily this past year and that is as long as she feels...loved" Voldemort paused treating the word love as if it was a piece of filth. "She will stay true and loyal to that person."   
Lucious bowed. "Yes my Lord." And then a few other words were exchanged between them and Luscious left. Little did they know that Snape had been standing there in the shadows listening to every word said between them. Snape smiled and looked at his wand. "Streius." He whispered and the recording spell on his wand stopped. Then he apparated to Dumbledores office.   
***  
James reached his apartment slamming the door shut.   
"Where've you been?" asked Sirius groggily looking up from his midnight snack.   
"What are you doing up so late?" asked James.   
"Eating. I get up at this time every night and have a snack."   
"Hey! Were you the one who ate my cake slice two days ago?"   
Sirius shrugged. "Maybe. But back to the original question Where were you?"   
James then explained everything to Sirius.   
"Let me see the parchment." Said Sirius.   
James handed him the parchment.   
"James Lily didn't write this. She caste a charm on the parchment so that it had the first few words she thought suddenly appear on it. This was conjured so I think it's going to disappear in about an hour." Sirius concluded.   
James put his head in his hands. "I'm still going tomorrow so don't try to stop me."   
"But it could be a trap! You never know! What if it was polyjuice potion? You'd never know it wasn't Lily not even by the handwriting because this was conjured!" Sirius protested.   
"Sirius I'm going." Said James and that was the end of the discussion.   
***  
Lily was confused. Lucious...he couldn't like her could he? She didn't like him at all.   
'maybe I should talk to him about it.' She thought to herself and apparated to his house. It was a huge manor. Made of gray stones. Like a huge dungeon. Lily walked in to see Narcissa another deatheater there kissing Lucious.   
"Oh so what was all that you deserve better Lily shit before?" asked Lily calmly. Lucious and Narcissa broke away.   
"Lily-"  
"Shutup Malfoy!" Lily said and apparated back to her own room. She started getting her things out for tomorrows meeting with James. She got out a black dress out that was tight and went down to her ankles. It was splashed with white flowers here and there. She also got out a black pearl ring and looked at the dress critically. Not bad. She concluded. Now what the hell am I going to tell James when I see him tomorrow?   
***   
"James when you see Lily bring her here if you can." Said Dumbledore. "Convince her to be spy. Also one of my spies inform me that Voldemort is gaining power quickly and he is performing dark arts rituals to become invincible. He might even use Lily to gain her power."  
"Professor won't that kill her?" asked James.   
Dumbledore nodded. "James you have to convince her to come over to our side."  
James nodded.   
***  
It was late and Lilt stood by the flower shop waiting. She saw a figure approaching and when she saw his face she smiled.   
"Hullo James." She said quietly.   
James grabbed her hand and there was an awkward silence between them.   
"I've missed you." Said James.   
Lily looked down at her hands entwined with Jameses. 'Blow the whole I'm a deatheater and you an auror so we can't be together speech' Lily thought to herself.  
"I love you." Lily looking up at him and brought her lips up to meet his. It was a kiss filled with all the love they had for each other. It was a kiss Lily hadn't experienced for a long time. She wrapped her arms around Jameses neck and they stood there holding each other for a long time.   
"Lily." Said James.   
"Hmm?" asked Lily breathing in his scent that she'd missed.   
"Please. Leave the Dark Lord and come back."   
Lily let go of James. "James do you know what your asking?"   
"Yes. Lily he's evil and we have sources saying that he will kill you!" said Jsames.   
"Speis?" Lily said. "Who dares to defy my Lord? I'll find them and-"  
"Lily do you know what you're saying? Lily these spies are the ones saving inoccent peoples lives. Which is more than I can say for you. You were the last one I'd suspect of being deatheater. You were voted most likely to-" then stopped abruptly.   
"You can say it." Said Lily. "I was voted most likely to become Mrs. James Potter."   
"Lily just listen to this." Said James handing her a small crystal ball. "I'll meet you here tomorrow at eleven to hear your decision." He said.   
"James wait-" said Lily a lump forming in her throat. He turned around.   
"Yes?" he asked.   
Lily kissed him one last time before apparating. She landed in her room and sat down on her bed.   
'I'll miss him' Lily thought as she threw the crystal ball carelessly onto the floor where it rolled underneath her bed unknown to Lily and she fell asleep.   
  
A/N: Review!!!!!!!!! Thanks to those who did review! Next chappie  
Will Lily make a descision?! Or will the crystal ball stay under her bed forgotten? Will Voldemort succeed in becoming amighty powerful bug bad Dark Lord or will Lily stop him? Find out next chappie! Review!!   
Thank you for reviewing   
  
CrazieBabieMeg: I know they have a habit of running into each other allover the place!  
  
KaTiE: I know I don't like fics with lily as a deatheater except flirting with the enemy. I was wary about writing this though...glad you like it!  
  
Chibi-Chingo: Thanks! You were supposed to be my beta reader :(   
  
LilyEvansPotter: I like Ashley to!  
  
Princess Hermione: Thanks!  
  
TheYellowSubmarine: Glad you liked it!  
  
Liz: bittersweet...that's a good word to describe this story! Lolz.  
  
EvenstarPrincess: I like the little girl to! I like Ashley! Oh she's so cute and sweet and ssmall and here I go again gushing on about her...lolz 


	6. chap6: Welcome back

Disclaimer: I OWN ASHLEY AND THE PLOT! NOTHING ELSE!  
  
A/N: OK I deserve to be flamed 110000 times and then drowned in flubber worm saliva! I AM SOOOO SOORY! I haven't updated for a loonngg time! Hey! I PROMISE TO UPDATE MORE FROM NOW ON! I've been to busy working on my other stories! SORRY!   
  
Waking up the next morning Lily thought about what to do. She was a loyal death eater and what would a loyal deatheater do? Turn James in of course but she couldn't. She just couldn't so she decided to stay quiet.   
***  
"Idiot!" Voldemort thundered.  
"I'm sorry my Lord I did not know she would appear." Lucious murmered.  
"Fix it!"  
"How my lord?"   
"I don't care! Just fix it!"  
"My Lord it can't be f-"  
"Crucio!"   
Lucious fell to the ground in agony.   
"Mercy my Lord! Mercy!" Lucious gasped from his position on the gound.  
"I show no mercy." Voldemort said.   
"Which is good." Came Lilys voice from the door way. "My Lord." She bowed low.  
"Yes Lily I found out about your little experience with Malfoy." Said Voldemort. "Does he deserve mercy?"  
Lily looked at him. Lucious writhing in agony on the floor and yet Lily htought to herself what did he do?  
"Do you love Narcissa?" Lily asked bearing down on him wirth her stare.  
"Yes." Lucious gasped.  
"Then he deserves mercy my Lord." Said Lily. "He can not be punished for loving someone."  
Voldemort took the curse of Lucious.  
"As James Potter shouldn't be punished for what he did to you?" Voldemort spat.  
Lily looked away as if she had been slapped. "He did it to save me my Lord." Lily muttered.  
"Save you from what?" Voldmeort spat.  
"From you my lord." Lily said and with a swish of her cloak she left.  
"Lucious!" Voldemort roared. "We're losing her! I shall not lose her! She is the key to our success! Keep an eye on her!"  
Lucious got up from the floor.  
"Y-yes my Lord." He gasped.  
"Now leave my site!"  
Lucious bowed and left.   
***  
Lily felt as if she'd been slapped with cold water. Talking with Voldemort had somehow brought her back to reality. James had done it to save her. These words repeated themselves in her mind. Reaching her room she looked frantically around for the crystal ball but she couldn't find it. She made a choice. She quickly apparated in to Dumbledores office. The headmaster was sitting there eating treacle fudge. She appeared right in front of his desk. Dumbledore didn't seem surprised at all.  
"Ms. Evans." He said looking up. "I was wondering when you would come back to us. Welcome back."  
Lily nodded. "Thank you Professor. Voldemorts next target is the Anderson home."  
"We will do all we can to protect them." Dumbledore vowed. "Although I think there is someone here who you should meet."  
"Who Professor?" Lily inquired.   
"The old Crowd. Look behind you Lily."   
Lily turned to see James, Sirius and Remus standing there.  
  
A/N: So what do you think? Yup I know short chapter! Maybe I should go on some more! Then again...hmmm lemme think...maybe it's better if I DO leave it here! More suspense!! LALALALA...then again I don't want any flames...oh why not? READ ON!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Lily suddenly felt as if she was going to die from lack of oxygen. The three boys were hugging her so hard that she felt she might burst but she didn't care.  
"We missed you Lily!" said Sirius in a teary voice.  
"I missed you guys to." Lily choked out.   
"We thought for sure you had turned over to the dark side. Lily I'm sorry I ever doubted you." Said Remus full fledged tears streaking down his face. The two boys quickly let go while James was the only one left hugging her.   
"James." Said Lily gently. "I have to go. Voldemort he-he'll get suspicious as to where I am."   
"No Lily. I'm not letting you go." James said fiercely.   
"You have to." Lily said crying.  
"No. Not again."  
"I'll come back later." Said Lily and untangled herself from James. "I promise." She wiped the tears from her face with the back of her hand and disapparated.   
"She said she'd come back later." Said James looking at the floor. "And I'm going to wait here until she does."   
No one argued with him.   
"I am going to take Mr. Lupin and Mr. Black to see the new trainng course." Said Dumledore. "It should take a few hours. You can wait for her. She'll be back as soon as she can get an excuse from the Dark Lord to go somewhere."   
"I know and that's why I'm waiting here." Said James sitting down.   
Dumbledore nodded and left with Sirius and Remus.   
James looked at his hands and sighed. He leaned back. He'd had another nightmare yesterday and hadn't slept well. Before he knew it he was out like a light.  
After three hours Lily apparated back to Dumbledores office to find it deserted and James sleeping in a chair.  
Lily smoothed back his hair. James stirred. Lily brought her hand back quickly not wanting to wake him. His eyes fluttered open and he smiled.  
"Lily?" he asked.   
Lily nodded.   
"How long have you been standing there?"   
"Not long." She said. James stood up.   
"I missed you a lot." He said in a quiet voice.  
"Lets take a walk." Said Lily.  
James nodded and got up.  
  
A/N: REVIEW! SOORRRYY! I KNOW ITS REALLY SHORT! BUT I HAD TO GET THIS UP SO YOU GUSY WOULDN'T THINK I FORGOT ABOUT IT OR SOMIN! Next chap: L n J have a loooooonnnggg talk! 


	7. chap7:An attack? A week early!?

A/N:Oh I know I took reaalll long on this chapter im reaallly sorry but I have to be in a certain mood to write this story. Thius chapter might seem a bit rushed but I really wanted to get this out!   
  
"Lets take a walk." Said Lily.  
James nodded and got up.  
***  
They ended up sitting in the stands of the Quidditch pitch. James silently picked at a small thread in his cloak.   
"So..." he said.   
"So..." Lily echoed.   
"Hows life?" asked James bluntly looking at her.   
Lily laughed. "Oh I dunno turning spy against my master saving a couple of muggles and performing unforgivable curses on others. The usual." She said with a small shrug.   
James laughed and the turned serious.  
"Lily we need to talk."  
Lily nodded. "You first."  
He brought his hand to rest on hers. Lily looked at it but remained silent.   
"Lily I-"  
"James don't." said Lily pulling her hand away. "Me-you-we can't." she said her voice trembling slightly.   
"Why?" James pleaded.   
"If Voldemort does find out I-I've turned spy against him then he-he'll use you as a tool to get to me. Please James don't. Not right now atleast. Things are to dangerous."   
"Lily things are going to get very dangerous as the days progress. Voldemort is gaining more and more power these days." Said James.  
"Not if I can help it. I'll make sure he doesn't gain any more power. Maybe by then the ministry will be able to defeat him."  
James shook his head. "The ministry is letting him take over. They're to scared to do anything."  
"When they see that Voldemort is getting weaker then they'll try to-"  
"NO Lily they won't" said James harshly. "They're scared to death from that last attack and will only fight if Voldemort trys to take over the M.O.M again. Otherwise they'll just sit around and wait for him to lose power."  
Lily looked at her hands. She didn't know what to say to that.   
"As for not getting involved." Said James more gently. "I respect your wishes."  
Lily nodded.   
"But remember I'm here." Said James.  
"Thank you." Said Lily softly.   
"Lily do you know any deatheaters? I mean so we can bring them in."  
Lily thought for a moment. "Well Voldemort likes to keep his deatheaters a secret from everyone even me but he doesn't keep them all a secret from me. There's Krakroff, Avery and Knott. There's Lucious Malfoy." She spat the name out with disgust. "And there's Severus Snape."  
"Snape's a spy." Said James.   
Lily looked up. "He is?" she asked surprised. "But he dishes out unforgivable potions like there's no tomorrow. Plus he hates muggles."  
"He's not all bad I geuss." Said James. "Anyone else?"  
Lily thought for a moment. "You know there is this one deatheater. He's always wearing a hood and Voldemort won't even let ME see who he is. Plus the deatheater is always around Voldemort. Doing minor jobs and etc. Like getting the plans for the next house we'll attack or even getting his pet snake. But I've never seen his face."  
James thought a moment. "He can't be that important right? I mean he does such unimportant jobs and Voldemort doesn't even bother to send him on missions with you."  
Lily nodded uneasily. "I geuss but the ones that don't show their faces are usually the most important ones. Most deatheaters don't even know who I am. I just know who they are."  
James shrugged. "It's getting late. We should head back into the castle. How much time do you have until you have to go back?"   
"About an hour. I told everyone I went for a walk and wanted to be alone. Luci-Malfoy tried to follow me." She said disgusted. "But I wouldn't let him."   
James laughed. "Would you like to go with Sirius, Remus and me to the three broomsticks? We could call Peter and-"  
"James." Lily cut in. "I can't be seen there. What if a deatheater who knows me sees me? As for Peter. Well I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone-yet that about my switching sides."  
James frowned. "Not even Peter?"  
"James he is a bit of a blabber mouth and if any deatheater tried to get something out of him Peter might just let it slip and..."Lily trailed of.  
"Peters not like that." Said James.   
"The millions of times I had to perform memory charms on people because Peter let Remuses er-problem slip." Said Lily laughing.   
"O.K. I get your point." Said James.  
Lily felt his hand over hers again but this time more out of support than love. Lily smiled and both got up.   
"So you know Ashley?" asked James as they walked towards the castle.   
Lily shrugged. "That little girl right? The one-"  
"Yea." Said James.   
"I don't exactly KNOW her...more like I've taken a liking to her." Said Lily. "She's so cute."  
James nodded.   
"James I have to go." Said Lily.  
"O.K. er bye. Hey drop by my apartment sometime. I live with Sirius. You can use floo powder   
***  
"Where have you been?" hissed malfoy.   
Lily looked at him angrily. "I went for a walk."  
"Master has been looking for you." He hissed.  
"Tell master he should have patience." Lily snapped.   
"If master caught you talking about him like that-"  
"Oh shove it!" Lily roared and brushed past him. "Don't EVER talk like that to me again! You forget my ranking."  
Malfoy saw red. She was just a pawn! Nothing else. It was him who had a higher ranking than her. 'Stupid mudblood.' He thought to himself. 'We'll see who has a higher rank when the dark lord disposes of you.'   
  
After that Lily usually left and Malfoy could never find her and lied to the Dark Lord telling him that nothing was up. They started to notice that the ministry some how knew the next house they were going to attack and deatheaters were being captured left and right. Voldemort was furious.   
"There is a traitor among us!" he roared and then looked suspiciously at the small, short and fat deatheater beside him. "If I ever find out who he is penalty will be death." He hissed. He then turned with Lily walking beside him.   
"Lily." He snapped.  
"Yes my lord?" she asked cool and composed.   
"Find this traitor and kill him. Make sure he is punished and has a long, painful death."  
"It shall be done my Lord." Said Lily.   
"Now leave me." He said with a careless wave of his hand.  
Lily bowed and left.   
In her room she floo-d to apartment 203.   
"James! Sirius!" Lily called stepping out of the fireplace.   
"Sirius isn't here but I am!" James called from the kitchen.   
"Alive or dead?" Lily asked holding her nose. The place smelt of fire. "What'd you do burn Sirius?" she asked opening the kitchen door to black smoke everywhere. She could faintly smell flowers.   
"I er-tried to make lunch." She heard his sheepish voice from somewhere.   
"Where are you? I can't see a thing in this smoke."   
"Try walking ahead towards my voice." Said James.   
Lily walked ahead and bumped into someone.   
"James?"  
"Yea it's me." He said. There was black smoke in front of her eyes and she couldn't see.   
"this is so stupid! Why'd you try to cook?" asked Lily.   
"Cuz Sirius went out a few hours ago to go grocery shopping and hasn't come back yet and I'm hungry and there wasn't any food and I found this recipie on how to make chicken the muggle way and I tried it and-"  
"No need to go on." Said Lily. "Lets get out of here." She said.   
"One problem." He said.   
"What?"   
"Can you find your way out of this smoke?" he asked. Lily could hear the grin in his voice.   
"You forgot I've been trained for things like these." Said Lily. "Grab my hand."   
"O.K." he said.   
Lily closed her eyes and used her instincts. She remembered that the way she'd come to the stove was clear and the floor had flt as if something had been dropped. She felt her way around and remembered the faint fragrance of flowers when she had first entered and and towards where the smell was strongest. She put a hand infront of her to feel the door and she opened it.   
"There we're out." Said Lily.   
"Yea." Said James.   
Lily finally got a good look at him. He had red pepper in his hair and some kind of brown sauce down his shirt. His face was all black and sooty to.   
"Augh." Said Lily. She pushed him. "Go take a bath while I fix this mess."   
Grumbling James went into his room.   
Lily then took out her wand and pointed to the kitchen after a few quick charms everything was as good as knew except for the kitchen floor. It still had stains on it.  
"Something's are best done the muggle way." Lily muttered and started cleaning the floor with a wet rag. Finally getting the stains out she got up and started to make sandwiches. James came out and looked more calm and composed.   
He came back and Lily turned around quickly making them both in a very awkward position with Lilys hand on his chest. She turned around quickly.  
"Thanks." He said taking a bite of the sandwiches.   
"They're your favorite." Lily added. "Fried chicken with mayonnaise."   
"James!" exclaimed a frantic Sirius coming into the kitchen. "There was an attack! A deatheater attack at Diagon alley." He exclaimed coming in.   
Lily dropped the mayonnaise jar to the floor.   
"But-but that attack wasn't-it wasn't supposed to take place until next week!" Lily exclaimed.   
"I know. I think it's Voldemorts way of saying he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants." Said Sirius grimly.   
"Is everyone alright?" asked Lily.  
"Everyone at Dreamland was killed and it was completely destroyed." Said Sirius. Dreamland was an amusement park at diagon alley.   
Lily closed her eyes and she suddenly felt a pair of eyes watching her. A pair of blood red snake like eyes. Lilys eyes opened and she looked around.   
"I-I think the Dark Lord-"  
The door fell open.   
"I knew it!" exclaimed Lucious Malfoy walking in.   
  
A/N: And the plot thickens! Lalalaaa ok I'll TRY to update soon! But don't get mad if this takes some time. 


	8. CHap8:Captured and geting things starigh...

A/N:Oh I know I took reaalll long on this chapter im reaallly sorry but I have to be in a certain mood to write this story. Thius chapter might seem a bit rushed but I really wanted to get this out!   
  
  
  
Lily stared at him in horror.   
Lucious quickly grabbed Sirius by the collar and put his wand to Siriuses throat its tip digging into the hollow of his throat.   
"Just two words Lily. Two words and he's dead." Said Lucious Malfoy carelessly.   
"You bastard!" she spat.   
"Tsk, tsk. Manners Lily. Manners." He said a lazy smile forming on his face. He looked at James sharply. "So you're the reason she betrayed us..." he looked James up and down. "I daresay master will want a word with you. But Lily seriously I expected better from you."  
"What do you want?" James asked angrily.   
"Isn't it obvious?" he asked snorting.   
"Me." Lily whispered fire dancing in her eyes. "He wants me."   
"Well give the little traitor a prize! She guessed it in one go." Said Lucious.   
"If you want her you'll have to get through me." Said James.   
"Oh but who do you value more? Your friend or your lover?" asked Lucious. "One move and he dies. Even so much as a simple summoning charm and I'll kill him." His grip tightened on Siriuses collar.   
"Let him go you bastard." Said Lily walking over to him. "I'm coming."   
"I think we'll be taking these two along just to make sure you don't try anything." Said Lucious. "Get the floo powder out now!" he barked at James.   
James got the floo powder out and Luious sent Lily and James together before him and then him and Sirius.   
Lily stepped out of the flames with James beside her.   
"Where are we?" he asked.   
Lily smirked. "My study. Lucious doesn't know that I know this whole place like the back of my hand. We could easily find a passage way and get out."  
James whistled. "Your study?" he asked. "This place is huge. My whole apartment could fit in here."  
It was huge. There were shelves upon shelves of books and black comfortable sofas and couches.   
"Lily." Said James growing solemn. "I just want you to know that I love you."  
Lily turned to face him. "I love you to James." she said quietly.   
He took something of his neck. It glinted in the light.   
"My necklace." Lily whispered.   
He slipped it over her neck and kissed her lips.   
"How touching." Said a lazy drawl.   
Lily turned to see Lucious Malfoy standing there. Sirius was tied up in seat.   
Lily felt her blood turn cold. A feeling Lily knew all to well. She gulped.   
"He's coming." Lily whispered.   
The door opened. Voldemort stepped in.   
"You!" he roared at Lucious Malfoy. "Crucio!"  
Lucious Malfoy fell to the ground in agony.   
"Traitor!" Voldemort yelled. He then noticed James and Sirius. "I congratulate you Lily. You captured two Aurors and found the traitor amongst us."   
"My-Lord!" Lucious gasped. "She's traitor!"  
Voldemort looked at Lily sharply before taking the curse of Lucious.   
"My Lord I called you here. I'm the one that said one of your most loyal deatheaters is the traitor." Said Lucious.   
"You dare lie to the Dark Lord?" Voldemort roared.   
"Its true." Lily cut in. "I'm the traitor."   
Voldemorts red eyes gleamed a brighter red. His scaly skin became a blackish color. The next moments for Lily were pure hell as without saying a word Voldemort put the Crucio curse on her with triple the force. It was enough to drive anyone mad and Lily felt as if someone was burning her alive. As if her whole body was being stretched and bent. She felt a crack and wondered if she'd broken any bones. She felt as if the life was being squeezed out of her. She wanted to die right now.   
"Stop!" was the only word Lily could scream. Her eyes blurred with tears and she arched her back in pain. Through the tears she could see a fight going on. "STOP!" Lily screamed louder and the pain left her. She lay on the floor panting. She felt blood trickling down her face and her arm hung at an odd angle. Voldemort on the other hand was looking...terrified? No. He couldn't be terrified could he?   
"Crucio." He said but nothing happened.   
Lily must've blocked him with her powers. She saw James tied and gagged to a chair with blood trickling down his face and unconscious.   
"Lucious are the wards set up in her room?" asked Voldemort.   
Lucious nodded.   
"If you try to apparate at all from your room your two boyfriends will be dead." Voldemort hissed as he stared at her in pure hatred.   
She was taken first to the mediwizards and her injuries were healed. Then Lucious threw her into her room locking it firmly from the outside. He then left. Lily banged on the door in anger. She then started to use her powers to throw everything around. She sent her bureau flying across the room and slamming into the wall. She lifted her cabinet with her mind and made it come back down with a thump. She then lifted her bed up and sent it flying across the room missing her by a few feet and slamming against the wall behind her. (A/N: She's doing this all with her powers! She's not actually LIFTING everything up with her hand!)   
She looked around for something else to destroy and take her frusteration out on. Then she saw it. The crystal ball that she had carelessly thrown to the ground the night James had given it to her.   
"It must've rolled under the bed." Lily muttered and bent down to pick it up. She tried to use her powers to magically turn it on but felt extremely drained now. She needed rest. The ball fell from her finger and landed softly on the carpet as she fainted from exhaustion.  
***  
"Come along now." Said Voldemort after he sent Lucious away with Lily and ungagged the two and revived James. James had been warned that if he tried his powers they'd kill Sirius. James and Sirius were floated into a dungeon filled with skeletons.   
"How much you wanna bet the skeletons are just there for decoration." Sirius muttered.   
James sighed. Even in a situation like this Sirius could never live up to his namesake.  
"How much you wanna bet that we'll never make it out alive?" asked James.   
"Sit!" Voldemort ordered. Both who had been tied up and floating were thrown harshly to the ground. "You!" he pointed at James. "Because of you one of my most trusted and loyal deatheater has turned spy against me! You and ONLY you! I swear you will suffer a very slow and painful death."   
Voldemort then took his wand out. "However Lord Voldemort is forgiving and merciful. Surrender to me and you will be spared. Become one of my deatheaters."  
"Never." James spat.   
"Oh looks like poor Lily will have to do then." Said Voldemort lazily. "Pity she was the only one who would be able to do the charm properly."   
James looked up sharply. "What are you talking about?" he asked looking up.   
It then hit him. He remembered how he'd talked to Lily about how Voldemort was planning to gain more power...by killing her!  
"No." James whispered. "No! Take me! Kill me instead!" James yelled and thrashed violently around.   
"I can't." said Voldemort lazily. "The spell specifically states that I have to have one of my servants a.k.a. deatheaters as a sacrifice and sadly you're not one of my deatheaters. You have to have the dark mark branded on to you before I can use you." Said Voldemort lazily. "However-" he added thoughtfully. "If you had a child from any previous flings I could use the child. It'll have your powers. Pity non of my deatheaters have wandless magic children." Voldemort sighed and smiled evily. "But Lily'll do fine. Perfectly. Her powers excel yours in everyway. She's had the best training and her worth is far more than yours."   
"Let her go." James whispered fire in his eyes. "Take me in her stead. Let her go."  
"I think not. No Lily is far more better than you." Said Voldemort. "Now for some fun." He smiled. "Crucio!"  
James and Sirius were hit with the curse unexpectedly. Both felt like their skin was on fire. Then it stopped.   
"Take me instead." James gasped. "Don't-my powers are more powerful than hers. Dumebledore wanted it kept secret but the magic in my blood is 200 WMW level."  
WMW stood for wandless magic wizard and the normal level of magic for them was 95 and Merlin had had 100. James went on. "I've never been able to use the other half. Its almost as if its waiting for something to trigger it."  
Voldemort smiled evily. He knew exactly what was going to trigger it. Lilys level was also 200 WMW. But it wasn't WHAT that was going to trigger the rest of their magic it was WHO.   
***  
Lily woke up and looked around panicked.   
'James and Sirius.' Her mind screamed. 'What if they died! What if Voldemort killed them?'   
Her mind then wandered to the crystal ball. She picked it up and magically turned it on.   
Lucious and Voldemort were talking.   
"But my lord." Lucious said. "Ever since the battle she has been acting er...strange. What if our plan fails?"  
Lily guessed this must've been from sometime ago before she turned spy.  
"It will not fail." Said Voldemort smoothly. "Worst comes to worst I could just use Potter as my sacrifice."  
"Why about Evans? If she doesn't follow the plan what will become of her?" asked Lucious.   
"She will follow the plan." Said Voldemort firmly.   
"But if she doesn't?" Lucious asked stubbornly.   
"SILENCE!" Voldemort roared. "I have worked to hard for our plan to fail now! I did not go through months and months of planning to have her parents killed at the exact time Potter broke up with her to have my plan fail! I did not go through months and months of planning for her to meet the Potter boy at the battle at the exact time I wanted to have my plan fail now! I DID NOT GO THROUGH MONTHS AND MONTHS OF PLANNING TO HAVE MY PLAN BLUNDERED UP!"   
"Y-yes master." Lucious whimpered. He bowed and left.   
The picture faded and the ball was clear.   
Lily felt the ball slip out of her hands and fall to the ground. She sat frozen in shock. HE killed her parents? Voldemort killed her parents?! NO! a car accident! It had been a car accident! Right?   
Lily felt anger rise up in her.   
"NO!" she screamed and punched the floor. When she stood up her eyes danced with fire. A golden aura seemed to radiate around her.   
Without a word she looked towards the door to her room. It flung open of its own accord. But there were spells around her room keeping her from leaving. With one pushed from her mind the wards collapsed. She didn't care that she'd just used Dark magic. She didn't give a damn if she had to use it again. All she cared about was revenge.   
Stepping out of her room she saw a handful of gaurds come her way. With a nod of her head she sent them flying backwards and slamming into the wall opposite to her. She walked on ahead and every guard and deatheater she saw were soon lying on the floor unconscious. A golden aura of power seemed to radiate around her. She reached the dungeons and the door to them opened. She heard a scream pierce the air.   
'James.' she thought and her heart stood still.   
She ran to the one cell door that had a stone door and opened it.   
James stood there an expression of pure agony on his face. On his forearm stood the Dark mark.   
Voldemort stood there smiling evily.   
"James!" Lily exclaimed.   
James looked towards her and relief flooded over his face. "Lily Thank God you're alright."  
Lily looked towards Voldemort. "You KILLED my parents!" she spat.   
Voldemorts eyes widened. He hadn't planned on that happening.   
"You PLANNED for me to meet James at the battle!" she screeched. Using her powers she sent him flying backwards into the wall behind him. "Why?"   
But Voldemort didn't give himself time to answer as he had called his deatheaters.   
James used his powers to untie himself and he then did the same with Sirius. Lilys anger was still there and thus giving her power. She sent a handful of deatheaters flying back into the hall. James used his powers to stun some and managed to get a wand for Sirius.   
"Lily! Lets go! I got Sirius a wand!" James yelled. He saw Lily trying to fight the deatheaters to get to Voldemort who stood in the middle of a circle of tightly packed deatheaters.   
James grabbed her. "You can't fight them all." Said James. "We have to apparate and get to Dumebledore."   
"No!" Lily exclaimed. "He killed my parents! I'm going to kill that bastard!"  
"Lily he'll kill you!" James exclaimed. "You've used your powers over the limit. There's not enough energy left in you to fight him."   
Sure enough Lily had started to feel drowsy but her anger drove her on.   
"Let me go!" Lily exclaimed and tried to squirm out of his grasp but James held her tightly.   
"Lily please don't do this to me. I couldn't bear it if anything happened to you. I love you Lily." James pleaded.   
Lily stopped thrashing around and started to sob into his shirt.   
"He-he killed my parents James." Lily sobbed. "For one whole year I've trusted the man that murdered them. For one whole year I lived the life their murderer chose and thoroughly planned out for me."  
"Come on." James whispered. "Lets go home."   
And with that they apparated into the Dumbledores office at the ministry.   
Lily to tired to explain from using her powers and then apparating without a wand (which was a very hard feat to achieve.) fell asleep in James arms as he sat on the couch with her and explained everything. Sirius sat in a chair occasionally adding his own comments. Lily then realized this was how she liked her life. With her friends by her side and she being held in James strong arms where no harm could come to her.   
No more was Lily going to live the life Voldemort wanted. This she vowed. She also vowed she'd get that bastard back someday. If it meant killing herself so be it. 


	9. Chap9:The really fluffy chapter!

Disclaimer: Hey didn't you hear? J.K. Rowling didn't write Harry Potter I did! ......... **wakes up from her dream** huh wha-! Damn!  
  
A/N:OK thank you for ur reviews and C I updated early this time!!! This chapter is PURE LILY AND JAMES FLUFF! Think of it as a sorry for what im going to do In the next chapter!!!  
  
James was gently shaking Lily awake. She opened her eyes.   
"Hey." He said smiling at her. "You dozed of while I was talking to Dumbledore. He's arranged for Sirius you and me to move into the high security auror buildings now that Voldemort knows where I live."  
Lily nodded drowsily. She yawned and stood up.   
"So when do we move in?" she asked.   
James shrugged. "All we have to do is go pack our stuff."  
A thought then struck Lily.   
"James how much are these high security apartments going to cost?"  
James shrugged. "We'll probably get a discount but it'll still be pretty expensive." James then realized that Lily didn't have any money except what the Dark Lord gave her.   
"Lily don't worry. We'll get an um BIG apartment and share it. You me and Sirius." He said grinning.   
Lily looked at him. "James I couldn't-" she started.   
"Lily don't worry about it." Said James. "I daresay I spent more money on you at Hogwarts anyway. It never bothered you then and it shouldn't bother you now."   
Lily shrugged. "But things are different now James." he said quietly.   
"How so?" he asked. "You are my girlfriend now if I'm not mistaken." He said smiling.   
Lily finally agreed. "Alright." She said slowly and then grinned. "But don't go getting any ideas MISTER Potter." She said smiling.   
"Why Miss Evans what would ever make you think I'd think something like that?" he asked in mock horror slipping his arms around her waist. They Eskimo kissed lovingly and James chuckled with his forehead against hers. "Although it's not as if we haven't done it before."  
"Oh no you don't." said Lily pulling her head back and shaking her finger. "We haven't been together for a whole day yet and you've got s-"  
"Ahem!"   
Lily and James looked up to see Sirius standing in the doorway.   
"I'd rather not intrude." He said. "But we need to get going now." He said.   
Blushing Lily nodded and followed James and Sirius. They flooed to James and Siriuses apartment where Lily found her wand on the kitchen counter. She looked over at the sandwiches she'd made and made to grab one. James got to it first.   
"James." Lily whined. "Give it back I'm hungry after all that fighting."  
He held it out but pulled it back again when Lily reached a hand to grab it.   
She made a face at him and James chuckling started to feed her the sandwich holding it for her.   
"You know how much I missed you?" he asked looking lovingly down at her as she swallowed a bite. He brought the sandwich to her lips again and she took another bite contentedly.   
"Do you know how happy I am that you two are FINALLY back together?" asked Sirius coming in. Aurors were everywhere except in the kitchen. James had pulled the slide window down that was part of the kitchen counter and let you see everyone in the living room. Lily was at that moment thankful it was down as James had his left hand in a very er...shall we say LOWER part of her back?  
"You're not the only one." Said Lily smiling. She opened her mouth for another bite but instead James popped the last bit into his mouth. "Hey!" she exclaimed angrily.   
"O.K. lets go." Said Sirius cutting in. "The aurors will bring all of our bags when we reach the building."  
Lily and James nodded. After aparatting and passing a series of mazes that they couldn't have gotten through without the guide they had they finally arrived at the auror building. It was a tall white building about ten stories high.   
Getting an apartment was next on the list. James left this all to Lily.   
"You're the woman here." He said. "Sirius and me are no good at finding good apartments."  
"Who found your last one?" asked Lily as she looked through pages of apartment pictures.   
"Oh one of our co workers Arabella Figg. She's a bit old but very nice." Said James.   
Lily nodded her hair falling into her eyes. James brushed it away lovingly and Lily looked up at him smiling. He leaned in to kiss her.   
"Oh please!" Sirius exclaimed before James could actually kiss her. "Stop being so lovey dovey and find an apartment."  
Lily grinned. "You sure know how to ruin a moment." She said to Sirius.   
"My specialty." Said Sirius grinning back.   
"Mmmm-hhmmm." Said Lily absently turning through pages. Her eyes suddenly lit up. "This one!" she exclaimed and jabbed her finger at it. The apartment was all white and had three rooms. It was more like a penthouse and was on the top story.   
"Er...Lily...are you sure?" asked Sirius.   
"Sure I'm sure." Said Lily. "Why? James has practically a gold mine in his vault so moneys no problem right?"   
"No...it's just well..." Sirius trailed of.   
"Oh yea." Said Lily. "I forgot you're afraid of heights."  
"Am not!" said Sirius. "I just don't like them."  
Lily rolled her eyes. "Come on." She said stubbornly.   
James paid and the three apparated to just outside the penthouse where it was more like a narrow white hall.   
"Oh and we'll decorate the hall with plants." Said Lily excitedly.   
"Whatever you say Lily." Said James staring at her.   
Sirius opened the door and James picked Lily up princess style.   
"I can walk on my own thank you." Said Lily smiling.   
"Yea but there's no fun in letting you walk in." said James grinning devilishly.  
"I know that look." Said Lily. "What have you got planned?" she asked as James stepped into the apartment. "Nothing." he said innocently.  
"James." said Sirius. "I'm tired and I'm going to sleep. You two...keep it down a bit."  
Lily shook her head as Sirius disappeared.   
"Call Remus and Peter." Said Lily excitedly. "I haven't seen little Peter for almost forever."  
"Oh sure call Remus and Peter. Don't spend anytime with me at all." Said James sarcastically.   
"You know your right." Said Lily as their luggage began to appear.   
"I am?" asked James.   
"Yea I need to set this place up AND go shopping for clothes for myself. We'll call Remus and Peter tomorrow." Lily smiled at James and began to unpack decoration pieces. The furniture was all white and Lily liked that.   
"Aren't you tired?" asked James.   
Lily as if on cue yawned. "I geuss." She said and caste a glance outside. It was pitch dark. She nervously drew the white curtains.   
"Whats wrong?" asked James.   
"Nothing." Said Lily in a higher voice than usual and slightly panicky.  
"Lily." Said James. He grabbed her wrists. "Tell me."   
Lily struggled for a minute and then gave in.   
"I'm scared." She confessed.  
"Why?"  
"Because-" she faltered. "Because I'm scared Voldemort might come and try to kidnap us again or kill us. I know I sound like a coward but it's the truth."  
James enwrapped her into a hug. "I'm here Lily and I promise you that I'll do whatever I can to protect you. And you don't sound like a coward"  
Lily smiled up at him and buried her head in his neck.   
"It's just..." she trailed of. James felt her lips brush against his neck as she talked and tear drops fall from her eyes onto his neck. "Its just I can't believe I...and I wonder if you could ever forgive me for what i..."  
"Shhh." Said James. "Its me that should be asking for forgiveness. Lily I love you and even if you were still a deatheater I'd love you."  
After a few miutes Lily stifled a yawn. She pulled away smiling at him.   
"Night James." she muttered. Giving him a kiss on the lips she left and fell into an uneasy sleep in her room.   
She awoke in the middle of the night her scream piercing the night air.   
She'd dreamt that Voldemort had been after her and that she was trapped in a cell. People passed and sneered at her calling her a mudblood and murderer. Saying she killed her parents. Voldemort came to kill her and everyone stood and laughed at her pleadings for help. Then just as Voldemort was about to kill her she woke up. James was by her side in a flash.   
"Are you O.K?" he asked worriedly.   
She sobbed into his shirt.   
"Is everything alright?" asked Sirius coming in.   
"I just had a nightmare." Lily choked out. "I'll be O.K. leave."  
Sirius hesitated before James also told him to leave.   
"Just go. I'll take care of her." James whispered.  
Sirius nodded and left.   
"Lily it's O.K. Come on stop crying. I'm here and I love you."  
"I love you too." Lily choked out. "I don't know why I'm being so emotional." She sobbed. "It was just a dream."  
"It's O.K. After what you've been through you have a right to be like this." Said James brushing her hair out of her eyes. Lily calmed down after a few moments.   
"Don't leave me." She whispered.   
"I won't ever leave you." Came his reply.  
  
The next morning Lily woke up with the sunlight streaming in through the blinds. She smiled and stretched out pulling the soft sheets tightly around her body. James stirred and woke up. It felt so right to just wake up and see Lily lying there beside him.   
"Morning." Said James softly.  
"Morning." Lily replied rolling over and slinging an arm over his bare chest.   
"Sleep well?" he asked kissing her nose.   
Lily nodded. She got up to go to bathroom with a sheet still wrapped tightly around her. James tugged on it lightly imploring her to sit down.   
"Lily." Said James seriously. "Will you be O.K? Are you feeling better?"  
Lily smiled. "After last night I feel as if I could take on a thousand bad dreams. James you just have that effect on me..." she trailed of smiling.  
James smiled and slyly ran a finger down her spine which was half bare making her shiver.   
"James come on we have to get up now." Said Lily.  
"Who says we have to get out of bed NOW?" he asked slyly. He tugged harder on the sheet wrapped around Lily trying to pull it of her. Lily playfully slapped his wrist away. She got up and went into the bathroom to get ready. Slipping on his clothes James walked out.   
"Looks like James got lucky." Came a voice.   
James turned. It was Sirius.   
"What are you doing up this early?" he asked.  
"Early? James it God damn one in the afternoon. How long did you two stay up last night?"   
James ignored Siriuses last comment.  
"One?" he asked disbelievingly. "We have to get ready for a meeting with Dumbledore."   
  
A/N: Im apologizing ahead of time...this was THE FLUFFY CHAPTER. The VERY FLUFFY CHAPTER which does not fit that well into my story as it is supposed to be a 'bittersweet' story as one of my reviewers said but I decided to put his up cuz of whats gonna happen next...lolz :) SORRY AHEAD OF TIME! 


	10. Chap10:The voice

Lily walked happily with James towards a flower shop. They met Ashley on the way.  
  
"Hello Ashley." Said Lily kindly.  
  
"Hi." Said Ashley shyly. Lily offered Ashley her hand.  
  
"Mss. Lily whats that?" asked Ashley. She pointed to the dark mark on Lilys fore arm. Lily winced. "That's a tattoo that a really bad man gave me." Said Lily.  
  
"And Mss. Lily did you know that bad man killed my mum?" asked Ashley innocently. Lily stared in horror. Blood started to come onto her hands.  
  
"And he told me to bring you to him. He hit me a lot." Said Ashley as if she was talking about the weather. Scars appeared on those innocent white arms of Ashleys. Everything around Lily began to spin and Ashley and her were the only un spinning things. Lucious Malfoys face came into view taunting her. Her parents voices could be heard telling her how disappointed they were about her. Lily knelt to the ground covering her ears with her hands.  
  
"No, no, no!" Lily exclaimed tears running down her eyes.  
  
"And all because of you Mss. Yes all because of you." Said Ashley innocently. "And then he killed me Mss. Just because I refused to help him." And Ashley fell to the floor blood seeping out of her head.  
  
* * *  
  
Lily awoke with a start in bed. Cold sweat poured down her face. Lily felt James stir beside her in the bed, She covered her mouth with her hand and ran to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. Lily felt sick. She wiped her mouth with her hand and sighed. She slumped back against the wall of the bathroom and sank down on the cold tile floor and covered her head in her hands.  
  
"Oh my God." Lily whispered. Getting up she went towards the kitchen for a drink of water. Sirius sat there eating the pie Lily had baked that night.  
  
"Sirius!" exclaimed Lily. "We were going to eat that for dinner!" Sirius shrugged and forked a piece. "Oh well.whats wrong have a nightmare?" he asked. Lily had been having these for sometime now.  
  
Lily nodded. "and sickness." Lily added. "Those nightmares are just so sick.they make me wanna throw up." She got herself a glass of water and sat down. Sirius smoothed back her hair from her forehead.  
  
"It's O.K." he said soothingly. "Don't worry. If you want we can get a dreamless sleep potion."  
  
"No." said Lily. "I'm fine. It's just that these dreams.will they plague me for the rest of my life?" Lily asked miserably.  
  
Sirius shrugged. "As long as you keep haunting yourself Lily. Forget about the past and whats happened. Look forward to what's GOING to happen."  
  
Lily nodded. "Thanks Siri." Said Lily. She gave him a peck on the cheek and left for her and James room. Lily and James had decided to keep one room. They weren't married yet but James was planning on asking her. It had become more like second nature for the both of them to see each other as first thing they saw in the morning and last thing to see before you go to sleep at night. The nights James was away Lily would toss and turn before finally falling asleep. Lily slipped into bed and James slung an arm around her waist.  
  
"Where were you?" he asked.  
  
"Nightmare." Lily replied.  
  
"Did you vomit again?" asked James. Lily nodded.  
  
James sighed. "Lily I want you to see a doctor."  
  
"I'm fine." Lily protested. "It's just-"  
  
"Lily please?" James pleaded. "All this vomiting isn't good for you. You could get seriously sick. You've been looking weak for sometime now."  
  
"Have not." Lily replied. "I eat like a horse."  
  
"And still stay extremely thin." James pointed out. "Because you vomit out all the food you eat Lily. And you've been having severe weakness attacks all over the place."  
  
"Have not." Said Lily moodily.  
  
"If you run to much or even if you stand for sometime you get dizzy and need to sit down.Lily I think you're seriously sick." James trailed of. Lily sighed in defeat. "O.K. fine I'll go see a medi wizard tomorrow happy?" asked Lily.  
  
"Yes." Said James. He kissed her temple and went back to sleep.  
  
* * *  
  
Lily walked into St. Mungos in a white sleeveless tank top and jeans. She'd covered the dark mark with a strong concealing spell. She had her check up done and waited for the results. Luscious Malfoy walked in holding her checkup file.  
  
"They'll be wanting this won't they?" asked Malfoy maliciously.  
  
"What do you want?" Lily spat jumping to her feet. She suddenly felt a weakness attack come over her.  
  
"Just to see why you're here." He said and opened her file. "Dizziness, vomiting, might be weakness.tsk, tsk Lily the Dark Lord does not like his servants being weak."  
  
"I am not his servant!" Lily yelled and put a hand to her head because of the dizziness. She used her powers to take the file back making it fly into her hand. She then made Malfoy fly back into the wall opposite. Malfoy stood up glaring at Lily and the doctor came in.  
  
"This man is harassing me!" Lily yelled. She had to sit down then because she was so dizzy and using her powers made her feel faint.  
  
"I'm leaving." Said Malfoy. "In a minute." He walked over to Lily and whispered.  
  
"I'll be waiting." This is why Lily felt no guilt when she threw up on him.  
  
"Damn!" Malfoy yelled. "These were Williams & Weras designer clothes!" he yelled and ran of.  
  
"You bastard!" Lily yelled after him. She got up suddenly and made a move to run after Malfoy.  
  
"Easy Mrs. Potter." Said the doctor.  
  
"It's Evans not Potter." Said Lily.  
  
"Oh sorry I didn't know you kept your maiden name after marriage."  
  
"No doctor I'm not married." Said Lily angrily.  
  
The doctor paled. "Y-you're not?"  
  
"No. James hasn't asked me-yet." Said Lily. "DO you have a problem?"  
  
"No. NO problem. Don't get mad.not good for your condition."  
  
"What's wrong with me doctor?" asked Lily.  
  
"Nothing fatal. You'll have to rest awhile.."  
  
* * *  
  
Lily stepped out of St. Mungos in a daze and apparated home. James sat there reading the daily prophet while Sirius ate some pie. Lily for once didn't scold him.  
  
"Lily what did the doctor say?" asked James. Lily walked past him and into their room. She dropped her file to the bedroom floor and sunk down onto the carpet. James opened the door and walked in.  
  
"Lils it's nothing fatal is it?" asked James.  
  
"No." Lily said quietly and shook her head.  
  
"Then?" James prompted as Sirius walked in and sat on her other side. Lily leaned into James embrace as Sirius smoothed back her hair.  
  
"Then what is it?" asked Sirius. Lily ignored the question and traced little patterns on James forearm where the dark mark stood.  
  
"You got that because of me." Lily whispered.  
  
"Lily." Said James sternly. "It was my own choice."  
  
"But if you hadn't loved me you wouldn't have gotten it." Lily replied. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Lily!" James exclaimed. "Don't talk like that."  
  
"What's wrong?" asked Sirius. "Lils tell us. Aren't I your best friend?" he asked making a puppy dog face. Lily laughed. "You're my best friend and the big brother I never had Sirius."  
  
"Then tell us." He said. Lily heaved a big sigh.  
  
"I'm pregnant."  
  
There was a stunned silence as James and Sirius dissolved this information.  
  
James cheek was against Lilys as she sat in his lap on the floor.  
  
"And the babys mine?" asked James and Lily could've sworn there was a hint of hopefulness in it. Lily nodded. He suddenly stood up and spun Lily around.  
  
"You're serious right?" he asked smiling. "This isn't some joke right?"  
  
"Right." Said Lily as he spun her around in his arms.  
  
"Lily I only have one thing to say and that's that we should get married as soon as possible!" James exclaimed and hugged her. "Why didn't you tell me before? You know I would've been happy."  
  
"I was still in shock though." Said Lily. "To tell you the truth I wasn't sure if I wanted a baby or not."  
  
"Sirius we want YOU to be the godfather of our child." Said James.  
  
"Yes! I've been asking that question ever since school." Said Sirius.  
  
"I'm going to call Remus and Peter!" James exclaimed and kept a tight hold on Lilys hand. Lily grabbed Siriuses hand with her free one. She truly felt at peace. This.this was her REAL family.  
  
Not those deatheaters and the Dark Lord.they'd used her for her powers.  
  
But they also gave you power.  
  
Lilys eyes shot up as she searched for the owner of the voice.  
  
You can't see me Lily.  
  
'Who are you.' Lily asked in her head.  
  
Someone.who'll be around for a long time.  
  
What do you want from me?  
  
Your soul.  
  
* * *  
  
"My lord." Lucious said bowing low. "Your suspicions were confirmed." Voldemort stared out at the land stretching around him. He stood in his tower watching the setting sun.  
  
"And will the plan be put into action?" asked Voldemort. Malfoy gave a creul smile. * * * Peter and Remus were over. And Lily thought she was going crazy. The voice just wouldn't leave her.  
  
The dark lord will take you back. There's still time. He is merciful and will forgive you.  
  
Never. Lily replied fiercely.  
  
You had it all. Money, Power, a family, people obeying your every command and you gave it all up.for what? The voice sounded disgusted. For a few friends and the man who broke your heart?  
  
That was a long time ago. Lily replied in her head. And besides you broke up with me to protect me. He was afraid that he was putting my life in danger.  
  
But aren't YOU putting his life in danger now?  
  
No  
  
Yes you are. You don't love him. You're putting his life in danger.  
  
No I'm not.  
  
Yes you are You know he'd die for you. He'd die to protect you. He'd kill to protect you. He even might join the other side to protect you.  
  
"NO!" Lily exclaimed out loud and dropped the knife she'd been using to cut up a salad.  
  
"O.K. so yellows out of the question." Said James after hearing Lilys exclamation. "I thought it would be a nice color for the baby's room though." Said James smiling. " Sorry James." Lily trailed of. "I-I um-don't feel well." James gave her a sympathetic look.  
  
"Why don't you go lay down for awhile?" he asked sincerely. Lily shook her head. "I'm fine." She said.  
  
"Lily no go lay down. If you don't feel well you should rest." Said James. He got up and walked over to her. "It's not good for the baby." He said and put a hand on her stomach. He gave her a rare smile.the special one he used for her and usto use to make girls swoon. Lily remembered those days.days when she was care free and not involved in any of this death eater shit. Days when James and her were free to love each other without some dark lord interfering. Days when her parents were alive. A single tear fell down her cheek. James wiped it away.  
  
"Come on." He said and scooped her up in his arms. He carried her into the room and laid her down on the bed. "Now you rest." He said putting a blanket over her. He stroked her hair for a minute or so and then kissed her forehead.  
  
"Every ones out there and it looks bad if the both of us are in here." Said Lily. "we're the hosts."  
  
"Sirius is out there and Remus and Peter are like family." James pointed out.  
  
"But you should go back there." Said Lily. James nodded and got up to leave. Lily rolled onto her side and closed her eyes.  
  
Traitor. Mudblood. Murderer. You killed your parents. If the dark lord hadn't been after you they would have been alive today. It's your fault.all your fault.  
  
No, no, no, no. Lily thought to herself. She tossed and turned in bed. She fell asleep with these words echoing in her ears and tears streaming down he face.  
  
* * *  
  
"Lily is something wrong?" asked James the next day. Lily dropped her carrot.  
  
"N-no nothings wrong." Said Lily. "What makes you think something's wrong?"  
  
"Well for one you put the juice in my coffee and milk in your glass." Said James grinning. Lily gave a small laugh.  
  
"Ready to go shopping?" asked James. Lily nodded.  
  
You're killing him. If he dies it's your fault.  
  
Lily knocked over the pitcher of juice.  
  
"Damn!" she muttered as the juice spread all over the table cloth and onto her white dress.  
  
"I'll clean this up." Said James. "You go change."  
  
Lily nodded and left to change. She changed into a black robe with a splash of white flowers across it. The sleeves were half so she decided to cover the dark mark with makeup. Going into the bathroom she washed her hands to clean them of any juice that was left on them.  
  
Even if you don't like it you will always be linked to the dark lord. His mark is upon you. You two are linked.  
  
No. Lily thought. You're wrong. We are NOT linked.  
  
He knows where you are. Your every move, every thought, every hope, every dream and knows every predicament your in. He can easily barge in and kill all of your friends. He can kill anyone.  
  
Lily shook her head. She stared at the dark mark and started scrubbing it with soap.  
  
It won't come of. Not ever. It'll stay there as a reminder of how you betrayed everyone. As a reminder that you killed your parents. Some marks never come of.this is one of them.  
  
Lily scrubbed harder and scratched at the mark with her fingernails.  
  
"Come of." She sobbed. "Why won't it come off?"  
  
Her forearm was completely scratched up and blood was coming out. Lily sank to the floor.  
  
You've become weak. You were never like this when you were with the dark lord. James Potter has made you weak. You were not meant to be weak. This dark mark is a sign that you are strong. Come back to the Dark lord and you shall become strong again. His mark implores you to. There was a knock on the door.  
  
"Lily!" James called. "Can I come in?!"  
  
"Wait a minute!" Lily called in a hoarse voice. She frantically scrubbed harder at the dark mark wincing from the pain. Blood mixed in with the soap and Lily was surprised she could withstand so much pain. Part of her training had been to withstand pain.she'd been taught not to break.not to be weak. And here she was. Being weak.  
  
"Come on Lily its nothing I haven't seen before!" James called teasingly. Lily gave a strangled sob as she saw that beneath her skin was the dark mark again. It was there and refusing to leave.  
  
You've become weak. You're no use to anyone. Everyone should forget about you.  
  
'I'm going crazy.' Lily thought to herself.  
  
You can't rip the mark of your flesh. It's there for all times to come.  
  
"No!" Lily exclaimed and took a small pen knife out.  
  
"Lily?" James voice came from the other side. His voice was now startled and concerned. "Are you O.K?"  
  
Lily didn't reply. She began to cut at the dark mark with her knife. James banged harder on the door.  
  
"Lily open the door!" James exclaimed. Lily bit her lip.  
  
Traitor. Murderer.wait what are you doing?  
  
'What does it look like.' Lily replied in her mind and she created a perfect circle around the dark mark.  
  
Are you crazy?  
  
Damn straight.  
  
The knife suddenly slipped from her hands and she was brought back to reality as the voice shut up. The door banged open and James stepped in. He stared in horror at her arm where the dark mark was cut up.  
  
"It won't come of." Lily sobbed. "It won't come of. Oh God James help me I think I'm going crazy." Lily sobbed. James knelt down beside her.  
  
"What happened?" he asked putting an arm around her. "I've gone mad James. I swear I've gone mad. I-I-" she broke down into sobs as James hugged her. He healed her forearm and cleaned up the blood.  
  
"What happened?" he asked as he lead Lily into the bedroom. Lily sat down on the desk chair and put her head in her hands.  
  
"I don't know. I think I just had a nervous breakdown." She muttered. James sat opposite to her and moved her hands away from her head.  
  
"Why do you haunt yourself about the past? Besides its not good for the baby. Why do you torture yourself like this?" he asked.  
  
"I don't haunt it.it haunts me." Said Lily matter of factly. She sighed. "I'm fine now though. Lets go shopping." James stared at her skeptically.  
  
"I'm fine." Lily persisted getting a little angry.  
  
James quietly got up and both walked out.  
  
* * *  
  
Lily sat in her home and brushed her hair. She felt her skin glow like it usually did when a woman was pregnant. She smiled and touched her stomach.  
  
The babys a death eater. A servant of the dark lord.  
  
Lilys smile was wiped of her face.  
  
It deserves to die. The moment you bring it into this world it will die.  
  
No Yes. Bring it. Bring it to the Dark Lord. He'll protect it. Bring it. Come back to the winning side.  
  
Never Lily replied.  
  
Look outside your window.  
  
Lily did as she was told. A whole band of deatheaters were torturing little children. Lily opened her window but when she did she saw nothing.  
  
A minor illusion that can become real. It can happen to your baby. It can happen to Ashley.  
  
No. Stop. Leave me alone.  
  
An image came to Lily. A small baby was being shunned by society for being the arents of two people who were linked to Voldemort.  
  
This is what will happen if you come to us.  
  
An image of her standing infront of a whole fleet of death eaters was there. A little baby sat safely in his home playing.  
  
  
  
James entered the apartment with Sirius by his side.  
  
"Think she'll like it?" asked James. The ring had three huge diamonds in a triangular shape.  
  
"she'd be crazy to hate it." Sirius replied.  
  
"Lily! Come out! I need to show you something!" James called. No reply. Shrugging James went into his room and let out a strangled cry.  
  
"Sirius!" he yelled. The whole room was a mess. Clothes were everywhere and the table was upturned. Nothing belonging to Lily could be found.  
  
"She-she couldn't leave.she just couldn't." James muttered. Sirius spotted a letter on the chair.  
  
Dear James and Sirius, it read. Don't try to look for me. I'll love you both always.  
  
Lily.  
  
"No." James muttered and dropped the ring box. "No." he shook his head and felt the world spinning around him.  
  
* * *  
  
Lord Voldemort smiled. "Mission complete." Said Lucious Malfoy.  
  
"It worked. I knew it would." Said Voldemort.  
  
"Wh-what do you mean?" came a small scared voice from behind Voldemort.  
  
"Wormtail you must understand.all this was planned." Said Voldemort lazily. "Lilys parents dieing, her meeting James.her betraying me. I planned it all. After I had carefully studied her for seven whole years I knew her reactions to everything.I knew when and how she could be pushed to far and she has been pushed to far, She'll surrender to us now. But its not her I want.it's that damn baby."  
  
"Wh-why?" Wormtail asked. Voldemort was about to reply when a medi wizard came in.  
  
"The spell has been performed." He said. "Her bad side has dominated over the good. From now on her good side will be locked up in a corner of her brain preventing her from.betraying you again and she can even kill now."  
  
"are you sure?" Voldemort demanded. The mediwizard nodded. "Her good side is no more than a small voice she wants to swat down.ofcourse now she also wants an abortion."  
  
"What?!" Voldemort thundered. "Send her in NOW!"  
  
"My lord." Said Malfoy startled. "Why so angry?"  
  
"All this planning you fool. It wasn't for her it was for the baby. I needed Potter to have the dark mark branded on him so I could use the baby without his or Lilys permission. Both are now linked to me. No magic holds me back now."  
  
"I know that my lord. That's why you had me bring Potter along when I kidnapped Lily." Said Malfoy. The pieces were slowly fitting in now. Voldemort had also LET them escape. Lily walked in suddenly.  
  
"My Lord." She replied and bowed low.  
  
"I trust your loyalty shall not waver me.again." Was Voldemorts reply.  
  
"Never." Lily confirmed in a robotic voice.  
  
A/N: How was this chapter? Hmmm? REVIEW and tell me! How many people hate me? This chapter turned out longer than I wanted..there were some other things I wanted to happen in this chap but its long enough already.9 pages to be exact.next chapter = tons of flames...don't flame me..you guys are seriously going to hate me! 


	11. Chap11:Secrets

Lily sat in an office looking as if nothing had changed. Never mind the fact that there was blood all over her hands. There was a small bulge to her stomach which she hated like a passion. The mediwizard walked in. he bowed to Lily and then handed her a small box.  
  
"What's this?" she asked taking it and getting blood over it.  
  
"That's your ultra sound." Said the mediwizard brightly. "Everythings fine and the baby is a he."  
  
Lily just nodded and got up. She gave a small start and hand to grab on to the mediwizards shoulder.  
  
"Everything alright?" he asked.  
  
"The damn boy kicked again." Lily muttered and stood up straight. "I either want this thing to be born NOW or I want an abortion."  
  
The mediwizard paled. "Our Lord will kill us." He said. "Me for aborting it and you for having him aborted."  
  
Lily snorted. "I know. Just do me a favor and I dunno-fuck off maybe?" she asked angrily. She turned and left.  
  
She walked unhappily towards her room only to have a few deatheaters come up to her offering greens and other healthy foods.  
  
"It's good for the baby." Said one holding up prunes. Lily stared at him for a minute. The next thing she knew was that the deatheater had a black eye and was stalking away. She smiled grimly.  
  
"Very bad." Said Lucious from behind her smirking.  
  
Lily turned and smirked at him. "What do you expect? I have swollen ankles for crying outloud! I'm not allowed to go on any missions that include too much fighting and after three weeks the Dark Lord gave me a mission to go and dispose of some freak ministry official. Do you know that he made me go and have a check up as soon as I got back?" she asked angrily. She threw the ultra-sound box on the floor and it opened up to show the ultra sound. Lucious gently picked up the box and shut it.  
  
"There, there. NO reason to get mad." He said trying to avoid Lilys bloody hands. "Why don't you wash them?" he asked eyeing her hands.  
  
"Oh shut up." Said Lily. "I haven't had anyone's blood on my hands for ages. Let me revel in the feeling for awhile."  
  
"Don't get angry." He said.  
  
Lily suddenly started crying. "I hate you all!" she shrieked. A group of deatheaters was walking past her. She looked at them and sent them all flying into the wall behind them. One deatheater stood up in shock. "Lily calm down for heavens sake." He said with the hood still over his head. She ignored the trickle of blood coming down the deatheaters hood.  
  
"All of you are on my back for one thing or another! Let me LIVE!" she exclaimed flailing her arms above her head. Lucious took a step back trying to avoid Lilys bloody hands.  
  
"Shhh. OK I am sorry." He said. "Just don't get yourself so worked up. It's not healthy for you." Said Lucious and Lily suddenly stopped yelling.  
  
"Thank you." She sobbed.  
  
"For what?" he asked bewildered.  
  
"How sweet!" she exclaimed and hugged him.  
  
Now Lucious WOULD have pushed her of. She'd gotten blood on his Armani robes! But of course he didn't because the Dark Lord had warned everyone of these mood swings and said they'd better put up with it or else.  
  
Lily was about to say thank you for caring about me and for once not saying this is good for the baby. He'd actually said it wasn't good for HER.  
  
"Don't cry." Said Lucious. "That's not good for the baby either." Lily pulled back and stared at him with her eyes on fire.  
  
Later on Lucious was seen walking with a broken jaw.  
  
* * *  
  
Lily stormed into Severus Snapes quarters making papers fly everywhere. Snape looked up and the next thing he knew was that Lily was holding him by the neck and had pushed him against the wall.  
  
"You!" she exclaimed. "Told them!"  
  
"So? You know it's my job." Said Snape.  
  
"What if I just conveniently let it slip to Voldemort that you're a fucking spy?" she spat.  
  
"What if I let it slip what is going on between you and him and what the both of you are planning to do with that child?" sneered Snape.  
  
"Bastard." Lily spat. "My first mission after three weeks and you tell the ministry about it. Do you know who was there as protection?! Huh?! Do you?!" she asked slamming his head against the wall behind him. "That bastard LUPIN! He's going to go and tell Potter who is going to be the little fucker he is and try to come and 'save' me from this place! Asshole! Do you even think?!" Lily yelled.  
  
Snape pushed Lily of him. He was in muscular strength stronger than her after all.  
  
"They have brainwashed you!" Snape yelled. "where is the Lily that WANTED James to rescue her?"  
  
"Dead and gone thank God!" Lily retorted. Snape grabbed her hands. "Look at this Lily!" he exclaimed referring to her hands. "Blood! Look at what you're doing! If you're still there wake up! WAKE UP! Do you know what you are doing?!"  
  
Lilys breathing became short and very fast. She stared at her hands and closed her eyes. "Stop it.' Lily muttered.  
  
"You've become a murderer!" Snape yelled ignoring her struggling and not leaving her arms.  
  
"Stop it. No." she muttered. "No."  
  
"You have blood on your hands! You have even killed a two year old girl Lily! And why? WHY? Because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. That girl was my niece!" Snape yelled.  
  
"Stop it." Lily muttered. Severus chanted it over and over again. Murdered, betrayer, Murderer. "NO!" she exclaimed. Her eyes shot up and Snape was sent flying backwards into he wall where he hit his head and became unconscious. Lily walked over towards him her long black robes sweeping the floor. She lifted them slightly and stared Snape. "Hope someone finds you." She said loftily and left.  
  
Arms came around her waist from behind. "Cool it with the mood swings." He muttered in her ear.  
  
"I'm sorry." She apologized. "Does it still hurt?"  
  
"Nah." He whispered and kissed her forehead. Lily turned and smirked as she felt his hands travel to the lower part of her back. "You know the promise." She muttered and ruffled his hair.  
  
He poked her stomach. "Don't do that." Lily said laughing.  
  
"Hopefully the little bastard just died." He muttered.  
  
"If Our Lord caught you saying that he'd kill you." Said Lily.  
  
"I'm too precious to his plan for him to kill me."  
  
"What plan?"  
  
"..."  
  
"I'll tell you later."  
  
"No now. What plan?"  
  
"Not now."  
  
"Stop-mmm-nice try. Tell me now."  
  
"..Lily there are too many spies here. I can't."  
  
Lily gave a reluctant sigh and pulled away. "Someone might see." She said. "Snape already has."  
  
"Is he going to tell?"  
  
"No. I have a deal going with him."  
  
"What kind of deal?"  
  
"Can't tell there are too many spies here." Lily said smirking. She didn't pull back though when he pulled her into his arms.  
  
A/N: **ahem** short.VERY short. Sorry but I had this written and my comp crashed down a longtime back and id put so much ENERGY into that chapter and it just got deleted and I didn't think I could write it all out again.and I didn't :P. That chapter kicked ass and was SOSOSOOOOOOOO long but well my comp crashed and so well..yeeaaa. But I mean that chapter was soooo gud I have to admit.this chapter was NOT gud at all.I changed it.cuz I felt like it :P. but this was part of the plot and I didn't know how to bring it about and I just did .next chap will be beter than this one I swear..just lemme get over this wirters block thing. Im going fine with my other stories tho.dunno why im having trouble with this one. 


	12. Chap12:The End

Lily awoke to the moonlight filtering into her room. She stared down at her stomach and felt a painful kick. Rising from her bed she apparated away.

* * *

"We-we've got to find her." James choked out.  
  
"How?" Remus asked.  
  
"I-I don't know. You saw her." Said James. He paced the floor nervously." I need her Remus. I can't live without her. My life feels.....empty." he admitted.  
  
"Well we could-we could break into the Dark Lords lair." He said reasonably.  
  
"YOU WHAT?" roared Lucius Malfoy the next morning at Lily.  
  
"It's MY CHOICE!" she yelled back.  
  
"The dark lord is going to KILL you." He hissed.  
  
"Let him try." Lily ground out.  
  
The dark lord then entered the room with his sweeping robes. "Let me try what?" he asked silkily.  
  
"I aborted the baby." Said Lily monotonously.  
  
Voldemorts eyes widened. The next thing Lily knew was the she had been sent back into the opposite wall. Her head hit the wall painfully. "Under whose orders?" he hissed.  
  
"Under my own orders." Lily moaned rubbing her head.  
  
"HOW DARE YOU DISOBEY ME!" he roared. Lily found herself floating in the air and then suddenly dropped roughly onto the ground again.  
  
Fire sparked in her eyes as she struggled to regain her senses. Blinded by pain and anger she sent Voldemort flying into the nearest wall.  
  
"How dare you try to use magic against me?" Lily hissed. "It's my body and my choice. You have no right-"  
  
"I have the right to control you Lillian Evans!" he roared. "The moment I branded you with my mark you became mine! I own your soul! It belongs to me! That damn baby's soul also belonged to me! IT WAS YOU who had no right! You have no right to make your own decisions! You belong to me you impotent girl! You just ruined years of planning! I have no use for you now." He pointed his wand at her angrily and muttered a few words.  
  
Fog cleared in Lilys head as she once again became the old Lily.  
  
"Wha-"she suddenly clutched her stomach. "What have I done?" she whispered. She looked around. "I can't believe I-"her eyes riveted to Voldemort. "What did you do to me?" she whispered. "What did you do to me when I came back to you?" she asked again angrily. "What did you do to me you sick bastard?" she cried aloud and sent him flying across the room.  
  
"Stop it!" Lucius commanded Lily and grabbed her arms. "Are you in your senses?"  
  
"Get your hands off me!" she snarled and pulled away turning a sickly green. Lucius seemed to pale slightly and tried to reach out and grab her. "It's me. Calm down." He said trying to soothe her.  
  
"Let her go Lucius!" Voldemort roared. "We have no use for her!" Lucius suddenly backed away from her and went to stand beside Lord Voldemort.

Lilys face contorted with disbelief but yet she wasn't as surprised as she should have been. He was after all going to marry Narcissa. 'It was all just a simple plan.' Lily thought angrily. Nevertheless she voiced her feelings. "I thought you cared for me!" she yelled "I can't believe I actually carried on an affair with you while I was here!" she took her wand and apparated away.  
  
Lily reached the flat that had belonged to her and James. Everything was almost as it had been. And there she spotted James sitting with his head between his hands and Remus sitting across from him. Tears formed in Lilys eyes.  
  
"James!" she cried and ran into his arms. James stared at her surprised. " He-he did something to me." Lily cried out. "I don't know what but it made my evil side dominant and I-I-"she choked. "I aborted our child." She clutched her stomach.  
  
"What?" asked James staring at her in disbelief. He couldn't believe what had just happened. A moment ago he'd been thinking of breaking into Voldemorts lair to get her and here she was in his arms.  
  
"It's a trap!" Remus exclaimed. "James get away from her. She might be a deatheater with poly juice potion. Or maybe it's the real Lily whose been sent to kill us."  
  
"I swear I'm not a trap!" she exclaimed. "Voldemort said he had no use for me anymore and let me go."  
  
Remus stared at her suspiciously. He took James aside.  
  
"Keep her with you but don't let her out of your sight James." He whispered. "I'm going to go look up into this. Severus will definitely know something." Remus then left.  
  
Lily wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "James I'm so sorry. So sorry." She whispered. James stared at her unsure of what to do. She'd left him. She'd left him and she'd probably leave him again.  
  
He scratched his head thoughtfully. "Why don't you um-go get some sleep. Your room is just as it was before." He supplied before walking into his own room and locking the door behind him.  
  
Lily felt as if she'd been stabbed in the back. 'It had been our room.' She thought to herself. She got up and went to get some sleep in her old room. A small voice had returned into her head though.  
  
_'He hates you'_  
  
'No he doesn't' Lily replied. 'He's just...preoccupied.'  
  
_'Don't lie to yourself. It's better to go back and beg for mercy. The dark lord won't torture you...too much.'_  
  
'Shut up.' Lily thought fiercely and fell asleep.  
  
James unlocked his door silently. Lily's door was open and he watched her. A frown was on her face as she turned and tossed in bed. He then walked into the living room. Sirius apparated in front of him.  
  
"James we're taking Lily down to the Order of the phoenix headquarters for a checkup." He said.  
  
James turned to look into Lily's room. "Do I have to go wake her up?" he asked painfully. "Why can't you go wake her up?"  
  
Sirius stepped back. "What if she's...not decent." A grin appeared on his face. "On second thought..."  
  
"I think I better go instead." Said James hastily. He walked into Lily's room and sat on her bed. He watched her change sides before shaking her awake.  
  
Lily gasped as she woke up. Cold sweat poured down her face.  
  
"We're taking you to the order of the phoenix headquarters for a check up." He said. "Get ready."  
  
Lily got up painfully. Technically she was supposed to be on bed rest but she refused to feel weak. Changing into some of her old clothes (a light grey robe) that she'd found in her closet she flloo-ed away with James feeling an odd sensation in her gut.  
  
Reaching a strange house she looked around in awe. "What is this place?" she asked.  
  
"It's the Orders infirmary." He said gruffly. Lily felt queasy and sat down in a chair. A nurse suddenly came and called her name out. Lily followed her and James came behind. James was about to hang back and let Lily go in but she insisted that James come in with her. They reached a small room in which Lily sat down.  
  
A faint feeling washed over her. "I think I'll just lay down in this bed." She said breathlessly and laid herself down. The next thing she knew was that her world had gone black.

* * *

"Tsk tsk." Flooeing in her condition?" a voice came. "Well at least we found the source of the problem." the doctor was telling James. Lily's eyes fluttered open.  
  
"Better to have checked her while she was asleep anyway otherwise she wouldn't have been able to let us check her even if she wanted to. "  
  
James glanced at Lily. "You-you're awake." He said relieved.. Lily gave a small smile and glanced at the medi-witch.  
  
"Dear are you feeling better?" asked the plump witch kindly.  
  
Lily nodded.  
  
"No odd voices in your head anymore?"  
  
Lily looked up sharply with an inquiring look.  
  
"The Dark Lord, he planted something inside of you dear. It's sort of like a mind controller. It influences the decisions you make. It is given in the form of a potion. In your case I'm guessing it was given to through your drink. It was probably incase you ever rebelled. When you drink the potion you are then telepathically linked with a deatheater of Voldemorts who then tries to influence your decisions by speaking to you. It's a favorite way of the Dark Lords to torture his prisoners."  
  
Lily could have hit herself. Why hadn't she realized this before? "How'd you take it out?" Lily asked.  
  
"Oh it's simple. You see once you drink the potion it goes and gathers at the back of your head right here-"she tapped the back of Lilys head lightly. "-we just drained it away. If you were awake that voice would've driven you mad and you wouldn't have been able to let us examine you." The medi-witch checked Lilys eyes and throat. "Oh and I'm forbidding you to get up from your bed for at least a month. You shouldn't have floo-ed here in your condition. It would've been so much easier though if you hadn't gone to a muggle hospital. Apparating is also out of the question."  
  
"How will I get back to my apartment?" Lily asked.  
  
"There are other ways of transportation." The medi-witch said kindly before leaving.  
  
Lily breathed in heavily. "Lets go James." She said and got up unsteadily.  
  
"Are you sure you're O.K.?" he asked uncertainly. "Maybe we should wait for a few hours before leaving."  
  
"I'm fine." Lily said reassuringly. "I just want to go home."  
  
James led her out of the infirmary and out of the building. They hailed the night bus and reached the apartment faster than expected. Lily at once went into her room and flopped down on the bed.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?" James asked her quietly coming in behind her.  
  
"Tell you what?" Lily asked.  
  
"About the voice? It would've saved us a lot of trouble." James stated.  
  
Lily rubbed her eyes tiredly. This was the last thing she needed. "I-I thought I was going crazy. I didn't want you to think I was crazy. I thought I could handle it."  
  
"Why do you always have to try and be the strong one?" James said angrily. "It always blows up in your face and you end up creating problems for all of us! If you could just learn to trust-"  
  
"Trust who James?" Lily challenged. "Trust you who left me in seventh year?!"  
  
"You damn well know why I had to do that Lily! Don't try and turn the tables here!" James retorted.  
  
"I'm not trying to!" Lily replied in anger. "I'm just stating the bare facts!"  
  
James opened his mouth to reply but Lily cut him off. "Just shut up!" she yelled. "I know you're angry at me but I am not in the mood to fight with you. I'm sorry I left you, James. I really am sorry but someone else was influencing my decisions and I'm sorry that I didn't tell you about the voice before. It's just I didn't want you to think I was crazy. Our life was going so well, I didn't want to ruin it. I thought I could handle it and I was wrong." Lily said bitterly. "It was just a huge mistake on my part but honestly you cannot stand there as if you have never made mistakes as big as mine. You left me to so don't act like everything is my fault." She took in a breath and felt tears gathering in her eyes. "Just please go." She begged. "I don't want to fight."  
  
And with that Lily pulled the covers over herself. James stared at where Lily lay for about two minutes before turning and leaving.  
  
"I could hear you two all the way from the second floor kicking up a storm." Said Remus who was sitting on the couch. Sirius entered the room with a club sandwich.  
  
James sat down with his head in his hands. "What am I supposed to do?" he asked.  
  
Remus chuckled. "You know Lily. She's not going to be the first to end this little squabble. It's you Prongs, who will have to as they say 'Lower the wings of humility'."  
  
James sighed. "But it's her fault too."  
  
"Yes and she admitted it giving her the upper hand." Said Remus.  
  
"She really knows how to turn the tables." Said Sirius and sat down beside James. He took a huge bite of his sandwich.  
  
"Yea." James said in a dreamy voice. He couldn't help but smile fondly.  
  
Remus stood up. "Well Padfoot and I must get going. Wormtail is supposed to meet as at the three broomsticks."  
  
"That's right!" said James standing up. "I completely forgot!" He stood up to grab his cloak but Sirius stopped him.  
  
"We'll make an excuse for you." Said Sirius. "I think you should stay here. After all, it's not safe to leave her home alone when her temper is running amuck. We could come back to a broken or burnt house."  
  
Sirius and Remus apparated away. James went into the room in which Lily was sleeping. He was surprised to note that she wasn't sleeping but was wide awake. Her eyes were staring vacantly up at the ceiling. She turned to look at James.  
  
"I want to get away from here." She said abruptly.  
  
"What?" James asked confused.  
  
"I need to get away from all of this-this-Voldemort and Order of the Phoenix business." She got a misty expression on her face. "I want to go some where far away-for a long time. It's all becoming too much for me. A summer vacation will do me some good."  
  
James quietly sat down on the bed and stared at her. He ran a hand through her hair. "I promise you that we'll both go on a vacation as soon as you're off bed rest."  
  
Lily looked up at James with huge eyes and accepted his unspoken apology. She grabbed his hand and slowly fell into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

"James come on!" Lily yelled excitedly as she ran along the beach. James followed behind her. "You're supposed to be a top auror." Lily said tauntingly. "And you can't even keep up with little old me!"  
  
"Chasing after an over energetic woman was not in my training course!" He panted and came to a halt beside her.  
  
Lily giggled as she looked at his state. James glanced up at her. The color had come back in her rosy cheeks and there was a sparkle in her eye that he hadn't seen since their Hogwarts days. However her eyes now held a glint of wisdom in them, which indicated all the pain she'd been through and how much she'd seen.  
  
James stood up straight and took Lily into his arms. "I love you." He whispered.  
  
Lily smiled up at him and opened her mouth but before she could reply James had taken something out of the back pocket of his khakis.  
  
"I know we haven't been the best of couples." He said quietly. "Bu we've been through so much together and now I'm positive that we're inseparable. Lily will you marry me?" he asked with nervous eyes but a calm outlook.  
  
Her eyes widened as she looked at the ring. It had three diamonds forming a triangle. Unknown to her it was the ring James had bought oh so long ago when he'd been planning on proposing to her but had come home to an empty house.  
  
She held out her hand and James slipped it on. James leaned in to kiss her but Lily suddenly wiggled out of his grasp. "Last one in the water has to bring the winner breakfast in bed!" she yelled and ran towards the ocean. Laughing James followed her.

* * *

"I was mad." Lily blubbered. "Absolutely mad to have said yes to him." She muttered.  
  
"Now Lily-"Remus began calmly.  
  
"Don't you now Lily me!" she snarled and turned on Remus. Remus cowered under her gaze.  
  
Ashley suddenly entered the small room in a pale yellow dress that flared out from the middle onwards. Her hair was done up with wreaths of lilies and a basket of roses hung from her arm.  
  
"Look at me!" Ashley yelled and twirled around.  
  
"Yes, yes darling you look wonderful." Muttered Lily and smoothed her own white dress out.  
  
Sirius suddenly entered the room with a look of panic on his face. "Lily do you have something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue?"  
  
Lily rolled her eyes. "Yes." She said.  
  
"Are you sure?" Sirius asked. He eyed her critically. "Lets see.... Your dress is new, your earrings are old, your shoes belonged to Remus's mum and you borrowed those from him....you don't have anything blue."  
  
"Yes I do." Lily persisted.  
  
"What?" Sirius challenged.  
  
"My-um-my-"Lily turned red slightly. "My underwear is pale blue."  
  
Sirius whistled and gave her a wink. "That'll keep Prongs preoccupied until the ceremony starts."  
  
"Shut up." Lily said and put her hands over her face.  
  
Sirius turned and left.  
  
"I'm so nervous." Lily said. She opened the window and took in a breath of fresh air.  
  
Peter came in and announced that the ceremony was beginning.  
  
"Remus." Lily gasped. "I can't do this. Please don't make me do this. What if I'm making a mistake? What if our habits clash? What if our personalities clash? What if we get sick of each other? What if Voldemort comes in our way?"  
  
"Lily." Remus said calmly. "Are you going to let a bunch of 'what ifs' come between you and James?"  
  
Lily stared at her hands for a minute and then looked at Remus resolutely. "You're right." She said and took Remus's offered arm.  
  
She entered the aisle and walked down it. Her jitters disappeared the moment she laid eyes on James. He seemed nervous but his eyes glowed with affection as he looked at her. He gave her a reassuring smile as he took her hand in his. They had decided on doing their own vows. Lily cleared her throat.  
  
"James I never thought in a million years that would be standing here with you. I loved you secretly for the longest time in our Hogwarts years but I always thought that you looked at me as just a friend. I always thought that I was not your type. All that changed in fifth year. I wondered why it had never hit me before how compatible we are. Even-even after we graduated I had this-this feeling that we'd someday end up here. I just didn't know when and now that we have, I can't wait for the life ahead of us." Lily took her ring and slipped onto James's finger. 

James took a deep breath. "I had a speech prepared." He said. "But the moment I saw you walk down the aisle I knew that I would never be able to convey what I feel for you. I was nervous a few minutes ago. I wondered if I was doing the right thing. Then I saw you enter the hall and I knew that there was nobody else I'd like to see walking down that aisle towards me other than you. Lillian Evans I loved you for a long time before finally confessing it and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you." Sirius felt around in his pockets for the ring. James gave Sirius a stern look and all Sirius could so was give a sheepish smile towards James.  
  
"I think I left it in my other pair of robes." He said grinning sheepishly. James glanced at Lily wondering what her reaction would be but Lily just laughed.  
  
"I don't need a ring as long as I have you." Lily said smiling at James. She then turned to Sirius. "And don't think I'm letting you off the hook. Just wait for the day that YOU get married."  
  
It was then that Dumbledore proudly announced. "You may now kiss the bride."  
  
James kissed Lily lightly before scooping her up in his arms and carrying her out of the hall. Lily giggled as James set her down gasping for air. "Lay off the sweets." He said playfully. Lily playfully swapped his arm.  
  
"Mr. Potter are you insinuating that I'm fat?" Lily demanded. "What do you think Mrs. Potter?" James asked. Lily swallowed down the bubble of pride that engulfed her when James called her Mrs. Potter.  
  
"I think you don't know what condition I'm in." Said Lily snottily.  
  
James eyes widened. "Are you?" he asked as they got in their carriage to go to the wedding reception which was being held at Hogwarts.  
  
"Maybe." Said Lily playfully. James just stared at her with wide eyes. He then pulled her close to him in a hug. "Why didn't you tell me before?" he asked and hugged her tighter. "This is wonderful news." Lily laughed. "Looks like Mr. Potter is thrilled at the prospect of becoming a father." She said and put her head on his shoulder.  
  
"Hey Lily?" asked James with one hand over her stomach.  
  
"Hmmm?" "What's this about you wearing pale blue underwear with I love Snape written on them?"  
  
"SIRIUS BLACK!"

* * *

"My Lord?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"They have wedded."  
  
"I think it's time to remind the Potters that Voldemort is still at large."  
  
"My Lord if you don't mind me asking...what is the plan now?"  
  
"I don't know Wormtail. That foolish girl. I had planned for years. She thwarted it in less than half an hour."  
  
"So Potter getting the dark mark was planned? Evans-er-Mrs. Potter rebelling and then coming back-"  
  
"All planned Wormtail because I needed the child! The girl was nothing more than a backup plan! I don't have the girl or the child! It's ruined now."  
  
"How so my Lord?"  
  
"Can you think of some other option?"  
  
"Yes. My Lord, remember that power stripping curse you had wanted to use on the girl?"

* * *

James emerged from St. Mungos checkup room with a small frown on his face. "What is it James?" asked Lily earnestly getting up. She was in her ninth month and her belly showed it.  
  
James scratched his head. "Do you remember how my WML was 200?" Lily nodded. "It shot down to 100." He said.  
  
"What?" asked Lily confused. "That's impossible! When was the last time you had a checkup?"  
  
James scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Um-a day before we went on vacation to the beach." Said James.  
  
Lily was extremely confused and entered the medical room for her own checkup. When she emerged a sort of satisfied expression was on her face. "James I know where your lost 100 WML is."  
  
"Oh?" James asked. Lily patted her stomach lightly. James couldn't help but laugh. "Of course! How could I forget! Then that means half of yours is gone too right?"  
  
Lily shook her head. "Oddly mine is still intact."  
  
"Well at least we know who the child goes after." Said James playfully. An explosion in St. Mungos sent the sirens off. People began running and a person screamed. "It's The Dark Lord! His deatheaters are attacking us!" Lily unsteadily grabbed her stomach and her face paled.  
  
Someone bumped into Lily sending her reeling back into James's arms. "James!" she gasped. "I think-I think I'm going into labor!"

* * *

"Sirius please, you have to. Voldemort has tried to kill us once already and Lily almost lost Harry. Luckily we were able to rush to the Orders infirmary and have him delivered. You have to help us. He's after us again." James pleaded.  
  
"James think of my background." Said Sirius darkly.  
  
"You're background doesn't matter Sirius." James said earnestly. "What matters is that you're my best friend and I trust you with my life, my wife's life and my son's life."  
  
"James no. The dark lord will suspect it's me."  
  
"I know you'd never talk."  
  
"I'd never talk but there are other ways. Truth potions, truth spells and the like. "  
  
"How about Remus then?"  
  
"No!" Sirius said abruptly.  
  
"Why?" James asked.  
  
"I mean the Dark Lord will suspect him too. We're safe with Peter. NO one will ever suspect him. He can be your secret keeper and we'll make everyone think that I'm your secret keeper. It'll throw the Dark Lord of your scent for awhile." Sirius said earnestly. After a little bit more coaxing James agreed.

* * *

"James he told!" Lily exclaimed sitting up in bed. "I can't believe he told!" There was a commotion going on outside telling the Potters that their Secret Keeper had told someone of their whereabouts.  
  
James shrugged on his robes. He took one look outside the window and turned to Lily. "I love you." He whispered before running downstairs. "Go to the fireplace and floo out of here!" He yelled.  
  
"I'm not leaving you!" Lily yelled and followed him down the stairs.  
  
"You have to go Lily. You have to save Harry." James said and ran towards the lounge where the front door was. Lily heard the door crash open. "Lily it's him! Take Harry and run-"  
  
Tears flowed down Lilys eyes as she stumbled towards the fireplace in the kitchen. Harry was crying. Lily set Harry down on the floor and picked up the floo powder pot. Igniting the fireplace she threw some powder into it. Turning to pick Harry up she realized that he'd crawled away and was going towards the door. A thud and a high piercing laugh told her that her husband had died.  
  
"Harry." Lily pleaded. "Come back here." Harry only looked around clueless before glancing at his mother and crawling back to her. Lily scooped him up in her arms and turned to the fireplace. "Damn." She cursed. The fire had turned back to its normal color. It was no use. Another laugh told her that he was near. Lily took her wand out and chanted under her breath. A green light emerged from her chest and went into Harry. Drained of her power Lily fell to her knees. She'd just transferred her magic into him. It would serve as a shield from Voldemort now. It had been piece of heavy ancient magic and Lily was now drained. She was finally going to have her revenge. The bastard wouldn't know what hit him until it was too late. The door crashed open.  
  
She knew she couldn't fight him even if she wanted to. Voldemort entered the room with menace in his eyes. 'He's going to kill my baby.' Lily thought desperately. 'He's going to take my baby's magic and use it as his own.' It then hit her. She didn't need to die. He wouldn't kill her. Her spell would only work if she died. Lily had to think quickly. 'He mustn't get suspicious.' She decided. Closing her eyes Lily swallowed her pride and opened her mouth. "Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!" "Stand aside, you silly girl...stand aside, now.." Voldemort ordered. "Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead-"Lilys body fell to the floor in a heap but unnoticed by Voldemort was the small smile of triumph on her lips. Her last thoughts were _Look who has the last laugh now.  
  
_That night Voldemort was unable to strip Harry of his powers. He tried to kill Harry only to end up having the curse backfire on him. Voldemort then realized that he had underestimated his trainee. After all she had been trained by the best.

* * *

"Where are you taking me James?" Lily asked playfully.  
  
"Come on Lily don't be such a second year." James whined as he pulled a blindfolded Lily down a corridor in Hogwarts. He opened a door and took Lilys blindfold off. Lily gasped. The room was decorated purely by different colored fairy lights and on the table lay dinner for two.  
  
"Happy Anniversary Lily." James said smiling. "It's been officially one year since we got together." Lily stared at James misty eyed.  
  
"You remembered." She sobbed and hugged him. James being a normal sixteen year old boy had no idea how to handle a sobbing girl.  
  
"Was it that bad?" James asked lamely and patted her back awkwardly.  
  
"I'm just so-so-h-happy." Lily sobbed.  
  
"I wonder what you're like when you're jubilant." James said sarcastically.  
  
"Shut up." Lily said and swatted his arm. She blew her nose on her handkerchief and looked around. "You're so sweet." She said and patted his head.  
  
James looked horrified. "Sweet?" he asked disgusted.  
  
"What would you rather be? Disgusting? Selfish? Arrogant or Sweet?"  
  
"I'd take roguishly handsome with a mischievous personality over sweet any day." James replied and winked.  
  
Lily laughed and James pulled her into a hug. "You know you have a really cute laugh." He said fondly.  
  
"I do?" Lily asked amusedly.  
  
"Yea." Whispered James leaning close. "You sort of close your eyes so that your eyelashes sweep against your cheekbones and you throw your head back slightly so that your hair falls around your face." He leaned in closer. "And you get a dimple right here-" he kissed the area a few inches away from her mouth and then moved his lips down to her lips.  
  
'James Potter you are the charmer.' Lily thought to herself as she wrapped her arms around him. "And I wouldn't have you any other way."  
  
_Looks like we made it. _

_Look how far we've come my baby. _

_We might've took the long way _

_We knew we'd get there someday. _

_They said 'I bet they'll never make it.' _

_But just look at us going on. _

_We're still together still going strong  
  
Still the one..._

_ You're still the one I run to _

_The one that I belong to _

_You're still the one I want for life  
  
You're still the one that I love _

_The only one I dream of You're still _

_the one I kiss goodnight  
  
Aint nothing better. ___

_We beat the odds together. _

_I'm glad we didn't listen. _

_Look at what we would be missin. T_

_hey said 'I bet they'll never make it' _

_But just look at us going on._

_We're still together. _

_Still going strong.  
  
Still the one..._

_ You're still the one I run to. _

_The one that I belong to ._

_You're still the one I want for life.  
  
You're still the one that I love._

_ The only one I dream of._

_ You're still the one I kiss goodnight.  
  
Still the one...  
  
Yea still the one._

_ You're still the one I run to._

_ The one that I belong to. You're still the one I want for life._

_ Ohhh _

_You're still the one that I love. _

_]The only one I dream of. _

_You're still the one I kiss goodnight.  
  
I'm so glad we made it. Look how far we've come my baby.  
  
_A/N: OMFG its over! I can't believe it's over. I didn't want to end this but a few things made me  
  
after OOTP this officially became AU I was supposed to finish this two chapters ago. It was getting to long. By finishing this it leaves me with enough time to finish up Princess Lily which was supposed to be finished by now.  
  
Oh and im so sorry for not updating for soo long but I recall saying that I would be busy until summer came around. So that means I'll be updating frequently now. What I am going to do now though is first I'm going to finish up Princess Lily which is basically a prequeal to the REAL STORY which will take place in the MWPP era. Yes that's why that story is not AU. I was originally going to write the story but there was so much background to it that I decided to write Princess Lily first. After im done with princess Lily and have started the sequel to it I will start working on revising Tale of true love. Oh and I'm working on a D/G story! I'm an H/G fan but this little plot bunny just popped up in my head and wouldn't go away until I started writing it. I will also be posting an H/G one shot soon. And please FORGIVE ME FOR NOT UPDATING but I was soooo busy during the school year and even now my teachers are making us attend one month worth of summer school b/coz our O level syllabus is not finishing up. So now they are literally racing against time to complete our syllabus. But its only three hours a day so I am now FREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!  
  
Just wondering.....?anyone know of really good post OOTP L/J stories?!!! I am currently reading the boy who loved lily ( I was so happy to se all the new chapters!) and that story is just GREAT! However it is slightly AU-ish and I want a non Au GOOD L/J story.Please recommend some good l/j stories to me. I'd prefer it if they were already completed but as long as they're good stories it doesn't matter.


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